Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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on how the UK could economise on NATO commitments
  (+3, -1)
(+3, -1)
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Ok, the RAF has about 124 possible fighter bombers. Easyjet has 178 planes.

The average Airbus A319 can fly at 537 mph, range 6,500 miles, bomb load 18,700 kilos and a bit.

Option 1 (the honest way) The RAF buys all the tickets, straps on a load of smart bombs, and that's it, all for £71,940. Option 2 (the sneaky way) Buys half the seats under assumed names, straps on a half load of smart bombs when no one is looking, subverts the navigation system to diverts it over the target, drop bombs, diverts to real destination.

Option 3 (the more imaginative way) Drafts the entire 1st easyJet Squadron and flies them at maximum bank angle of sixty degrees over intended in a very large cone formation to induce tornado over target. Minimum expense, maximum plausible deniability.

So, a few ways for the UK to cover commitments to NATO, save a few quid along the way, and get duty frees, even.

not_morrison_rm, Apr 02 2011

KAL 007 http://en.wikipedia...ir_Lines_Flight_007
depends who you believe the least [not_morrison_rm, Apr 03 2011]


       Except for that bit about airliners carrying bombs.
DIYMatt, Apr 03 2011

       "Embassy officials stated that the thankyou letter from enemy forces for all the matched luggage sets was unexpected... in other news a mysterious explosion in the baggage carousel at ..."
FlyingToaster, Apr 03 2011

       //matched luggage sets //   

       Well, wouldn't want them to risk their own lives and have mismatched luggage, what kind of an army would that be?   

       Ok, if you want to put more deterrence value, matched luggage and all of it Hello Kitty pink..   

       As for Western military use of airliners, I could be wrong but that's how most those soldiers got over to the Vietnam war? Also reconnaissance work, depending on who you think might actually be telling the truth. see link. I'm sure there's a few more uses that have been made I don't know of.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 03 2011

       You can't possibly buy the soviet line on KAL 007, can you?
RayfordSteele, Apr 03 2011

       Simple alternative: use DC-10s. No need to retrofit for mounting bombs, just install crude aiming device and fly in low circles over target until engines fall off.
Alterother, Apr 04 2011

       //You can't possibly buy the soviet line on KAL 007//   

       Yes and no.   

       The "Yes" is - I would be a little surprised if someone in the intelligence community hadn't thought of sticking cameras on airliners going near/over places of interest.   

       The "no" is - it doesn't matter if it's flying at a height of 500 feet over 10 Downing Street trying to get shots of our dear leader's boxer's shorts drying on the prime ministerial washing line, it's still not a good enough reason to shoot down an airliner.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 04 2011

       Yes, but the extra charges on EasyJet for excess baggage, seat reservations, not checking-in online, not paying with a Visa Electron card, etc. would make it more cost-effective to just buy some bombers.

Also, this sort of thing might encourage people to shoot down commercial aeroplanes, so [-].
hippo, Apr 04 2011

       //Also, this sort of thing might encourage people to shoot down commercial aeroplanes//   

       Jeez, just realised I could get sponsorship for this idea, so the next time an airliner falls out of the sky, the maker can blame the military of [insert name of country] for shooting it down.   

       //excess baggage, seat reservations, not checking-in online// Wonders if the NATO jets have excess baggage charges or seat reservation fees...one way to cut down on RAF expenditure. When you factor in the income from the duty-free cigarettes, I still think it's cheaper than buying your own planes.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 04 2011

       Good spy cameras take space and equipment. That's why we have RC-135's. I suppose US intelligence also caused the Anchorage beacon to be down.
RayfordSteele, Apr 04 2011

       //I suppose US intelligence also caused the Anchorage beacon to be down.//   

       I don't know, I wasn't there. The question is not whether they did or did not, but of probability. All states seem to regard even their own populations as potentially expendable, whether it's the UK testing poison gases on their own soldiers (without tell them), or the USA infecting Afro-Caribbean Americans with diseases, likewise not telling them. I would say that in a similar situation, even considering the potential risk of civilian deaths, if they needed the intelligence that much, then probably someone in the intelligence community would go turn it off.
not_morrison_rm, Apr 05 2011


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