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Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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no shaking movie theater seats

so you can watch a show without being annoyed by somebody shaking and tapping on your chair.
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at movie theaters, there're people who sit next to you and can't stop fidgeting around. or who won't stop kicking and tapping on the back of your chair even after asking them to stop.... so rather than beating them up during (or after) the show, make the chairs UN-VIBRATABLE. so they can kick and shake all they want and still you won't feel a thing.

yakkers and beeperers are another problem....

procrastinator, Apr 02 2001

Theater Sniper http://www.halfbake...ea/Theater_20sniper
Do away with tiresome yakkers and beeperers. [DrBob, Apr 02 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

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       Perhaps in the future we can hew movie seats from living rock. That might keep back row spills from travelling the length of the auditorium, too.
centauri, Apr 02 2001
  

       Or just concrete.   

       The problem is that the chairs are as flimsy as possible and crammed as close as possible together to get as many people in as they can, much like airplanes. If they weren't flimsy, it wouldn't be a problem; if they weren't so close together it wouldn't be a problem. The stadium style seating seems to work better, being a little farther apart...Best is a dinner-show theatre, real tables, real chairs, and real food...
StarChaser, Apr 02 2001
  

       Partially baked. The Duke of York's Cinema in Brighton has the best seats of any cinema anywhere in the world. It's just like sitting in your favourite armchair and with stacks of legroom (plus you can drink your beer in the auditorium as well). Send your local cinema managers there immediately, so that they can learn what proper customer care is really like.
DrBob, Apr 02 2001
  

       ...at only $150/seat, I imagine.
absterge, Apr 02 2001
  

       or take the opposite approach: a seat that augments force applied to it so that a light kick will send it pitching forward, then back with enough force to break kneecaps.
nick_n_uit, Apr 03 2001
  


 

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