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Civet Tiger Coffee

Double-digested for a superior flavour and aroma
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Kopi Luwak, marketed as the rarest, tastiest, most extraordinary coffee in the world, is made by feeding coffee beans to a cute furry animal called an Asian palm civet, and then extracting the remains of the beans from the animal's excrement.

This formerly-exotic coffee is becoming very well known, so for the true connoisseur who wishes to stay one step ahead of the trend, Wrongfellow Industries, LLC is proud to announce the introduction of Civet Tiger Coffee.

This breakthrough in the art of coffee-making is prepared by collecting only the finest and healthiest of coffee berries, and only the finest and healthiest of civets. The civets eat their fill of coffee and are given a short while to start digesting the beans before being fed to the free range, organically reared tigers housed in our world-class tiger farm.

Once the remains of the civet have been extracted from the tiger's excrement, the beans can be located within and prepared as normal, resulting in a rich, exclusive coffee with a subtly nuanced flavour, which is certain to please even the most refined of palates.

Wrongfellow, Mar 31 2013

looks like chewing to me.. http://www.youtube....watch?v=u0J6AbQY-FM
[not_morrison_rm, Apr 01 2013]

if you can dodge a mosquito in amber you can dodge a ball... http://www.plosone....ournal.pone.0057315
the ressurection of legacy gut flora and fauna is a serious activity... [4whom, Apr 03 2013]

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       The exact process should be tricking a little old lady into thinking she swallowed a fly, but is really a coffee bean, then she swallows the civet to catch the fly, it pivots in divots until surgeons put rivets inside her, I don't know why she swallowed the coffee bean, I guess I'll lie. Anyway this alternative little old lady civet coffee will undoubtedly be most popular.
rcarty, Mar 31 2013
  

       Grind coffee, infuse into hot water. <insert species here> drinks the coffee beverage. It urinates into a pot. The liquid evaporates off, leaving pure crystalline reside. This is scraped into jars and marketed.
pocmloc, Mar 31 2013
  

       The actual backers of 'Jurassic Park' were coffee conglomerates.
FlyingToaster, Mar 31 2013
  

       Have we not done every possibility of coffee beans and something's rectum by now? Not wishing to seem negative or something...
not_morrison_rm, Mar 31 2013
  

       //Tigers are better known for chewing their food// Actually, tigers are pretty well known for not chewing their food. They lack the special jaw joints which, for example, humans have; or the other special jaw joints which, for example, cows have. Tiger's jaws can't move side-to-side or back and forth. And even if they could, it would be a waste of time because they don't have the teeth to go with it.   

       Tigers bite and then swallow, and that's pretty much it. If you were to build a large enclosure and fill it with all the chewing animals, it would be a tiger-free enclosure.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 31 2013
  

       <attack of uberpedantry> "As in humans, the molars and premolars are designed for grinding and chewing..." off tigers.org.za   

       Like everything in this life, it's a question of definition. Tigers have molars, but not very flat ones, so are those just carnassials or what?
not_morrison_rm, Apr 01 2013
  

       my dog has teeth adapted for the chewing of very specialized items, so far the "z" key off my laptop and the battery door for the TV remote have been carefully chewed. Evolution has thrown up some remarkable adaptations.... similarly my dog once threw up a chewed "z" key.
bs0u0155, Apr 01 2013
  

       Kopi Luwak has nothing on Elephant Dung coffee at $500 / pound.
RayfordSteele, Apr 01 2013
  

       //similarly my dog once threw up a chewed "z" key.   

       How do you know it's the same one?
not_morrison_rm, Apr 02 2013
  

       Semantic debate to reclassify any toothy action as chewing.
rcarty, Apr 02 2013
  

       //How do you know it's the same one?//   

       I have no unequivocal evidence, however, he never left the apartment and we otherwise have all the Samsung laptop ''z'' keys that we would expect. He is a sneaky one though...
bs0u0155, Apr 03 2013
  

       Similarly, one could genetically resurrect gut flora and fauna from suitably preserved ancient species. Grind coffee, feed into micro-organism stills. Jurassic Perk, or the decaffeinated version, Cup-ro-lite...
4whom, Apr 03 2013
  


 

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