Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Darwinian brain cell theory

Kill the weak brain cells before you need to think
  (+1, -7)(+1, -7)
(+1, -7)
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I used to practice this in college sometimes. Go out drinking the night before a test, on the theory (excuse) that the weak brain cells die, leaving the strongest to tackle the difficult material.

I chose not to put this under the "health" category :-)


Hmmm, should we vote for purely humoristic ideas on the basis of how plausible they are, or for their comic value? Admittedly this one may have neither.

syost, Jul 25 2000


       It works until you get old enough that you begin to miss even the weak ones.
Scott_D, Jul 28 2000

       OT: I vote for ideas I want to see more of. This isn't necessarily correlated with plausibility...
egnor, Jul 28 2000

       Perhaps the drinking method isn't going to work, but the concept of killing off weak brain cells to encourage the growth of existing / new stronger brain cells is a decent idea.   

       Ignoring my total lack of medical knowledge -- aren't the weak or faulty brain cells taking up oxygen, etc. that your more decent brain cells could do with?
eagle, Jul 28 2000

       Now all we need is to figure out how to grow new brain cells....
centauri, Jul 28 2000

       When comparing healthly brain cells, is there really such a thing as a 'weak' one?   

       I would guess that all brain cells would get an equal amount of the "damaging" alcohol. And if this alcohol is going to kill the weak ones, it must also then be weakening the strong ones.   

       Also guessing, diseased brain cells, who may not be taking in enough blood or not able to process the oxygen correctly would be less affected by the alcohol due to the fact that they are diseased.   

       Of course if you could single out certain brain cells for destruction I guess it could make the rest of them more effecient...so if you want to increase your brain power get a Lobotomy!!
blahginger, Jul 28 2000

       Wait a sec: how does alcohol really damage the brain anyway? Is oxygen prevented from entering the bloodstream adequately? Doesn't the blood-brain barrier keep the actual alcohol out of brain tissues?
centauri, Jul 28 2000

       First, my brilliant well thought-out response: I'd rather have a bottle-in-front-o'-me than a frontal-lobotomy.   

       Also: Can this be done without the alcohol or the lobotomy? Is there a way to kill off selected brain cells without surgery? Can we come up with a way?   

       Also: Has anybody noticed that Vernon isn't reacting to these <pun>mindless</pun> annotations? Shouldn't we have a seen a rant about Darwinism or Space Alien Brain Waves?   

       Also: What the hell was I talking about?
eagle, Jul 28 2000

       Besides, it is no more likely that the most physically resilient braincells are the best at intellectual endeavor than that the most physically resilient people are the best at intellectual endeavor.
hello_c, Sep 08 2000

       "it would be best not to destroy the weaker brain cells, since they may be helpful in boosting the brain cells.
William Z, Sep 28 2000

       You know, I've decided that this is a really great idea. In fact, I'm thinking of expanding it to other areas of the body.   

       I'd like to elaborate, but I have to go outside and stare at the sun for a while. I'm trying to sharpen my vision.
centauri, Sep 28 2000

       Pick up line: "Hey baby, wanna see my Lobotomy scar?" Seriously though, people use damaged brain cells more often than you think. Take Vernon for example...
thumbwax, Sep 28 2000

       Since brain cells work together, killing the weak ones would demoralize the strong ones. You don't want that, do you?
Vance, Jan 26 2001

       That would work, except that booze kills at a rate of roughly 20,000 cells per ounce of pure alcheholic intake.   

       So it doesn't kill the weak ones, rather it napalms the neuron jungle.
AntHill, Jul 13 2001

       Denial isn't just a river in Egypt.
LoriZ, Jul 14 2001


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