Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Dog Balls Licker

  (+13, -1)(+13, -1)
(+13, -1)
  [vote for,

Canine Testicle & Anus Cleansing Apparatus

Does the act of mans best friend licking its balls gross you out? How about when he comes over right after to lick your face.

Well it seems to me that once you get used to living with a creature that does this the owner tunes the behavior out and does not notice the act so much (unless its a particularly juicy sounding or tooth noisy session) the owner might tend to not notice the time interval between the act and the owner having its face licked.

enter the plug in Mechanized tongue: always wet, always raspy constinuously undulating ready to go.

Once a dog is trained to use the device the dog owner can avert having unwanted matter spread all over their face by their dogs tongue.

vfrackis, Jul 07 2010


       This product fills a much-needed gap in the market. [+]
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 07 2010

       Thank christ it's not about a dog that licks my balls.   

       Mind you, I'm not sure about depriving my old mutt of his one remaining source of pleasure.   

wagster, Jul 07 2010

       // always wet //   

       A mild, hypoallergenic biocide in the fluid supply might be advisable.
8th of 7, Jul 07 2010

       And only dogs can use it right?   

       So two guys see a dog licking his balls and one says "I wish I could do that." and the other says "Don't you think you should pet him first?"
doctorremulac3, Jul 07 2010

       [+] remember to get one for the dog too.
FlyingToaster, Jul 07 2010

       You could use this on your face as well.
pocmloc, Jul 07 2010

       //remember to get one for the dog too.//   

       My vote for funniest Halfbakery post ever.
doctorremulac3, Jul 07 2010

DrWorm, Jul 08 2010

       Today someone asked me if I'd had a chance to see their cubicle. I had not and was intrigued as most are spherical.
rcarty, Jul 08 2010

       not a variation on stone, paper, scissors then?   

       +1 very funny start to my day.
po, Jul 08 2010

       excellent idea - I'm imagining a device like one of those shoe-cleaning rotating brush things they have in hotels.
hippo, Jul 08 2010

       I just noticed there is a Home:Pet:Sex Toy category. Ew.
Cedar Park, Jul 08 2010

       And it contains three whole ideas.
kaz, Jul 08 2010

       I was hesitant to read this idea in fear that the author had misspelled "licker", and the gruesome product the alternative might portend.
jurist, Jul 08 2010

       This product fills a gap, alright.
daseva, Jul 08 2010

       A man speaks to another at the bar:
"Is that your dog?"
"Look at him - licking his balls. Wish I could do that."
"Give him a crisp and he might let you..."
Jinbish, Jul 08 2010

       Could also be used by dogs what have, for reasons medical, been forced to wear a neck-cone.
calum, Jul 08 2010

       i never considered the neck cone thing?
vfrackis, Jul 09 2010

       You got to give it to ol' vfrackis a lot of credit for just goin ahead and typin' that sucker up in halfakery and then hittin' OK and sendin' that idear on out there into the dubbya dubbya dubbya.   

       (carefully rereads the idea)   

       Should tooth noisy be hyphenated?   

       Wow!  Think show dog.  Gold plated.  Judge:  'Balls well licked and ass properly cleansed.  Bravo!'   

       Infomercial.  Audience chants when queued: 'Dog Balls Licker!!!'
Mustardface, Jul 10 2010

       Is this a raincoat for one testicle?   


       Dog Ball Slicker
normzone, Jul 10 2010

       This idea has made my Top-Ten-Favorites list.
MikeD, Jul 10 2010

       I don't get it ... how exactly does the dog use this device? Is the device just sitting on the floor and the dogs services himself by getting close to it? ... if so would the dog really like that? Maybe the dog wants to have the sensation of his own tongue doing the licking (taste/smell/texture)
ixnaum, Jul 16 2010

       Dogs don't sweat in the same way humans do, so I doubt they would be very salty.
rcarty, Jul 16 2010

       "I just noticed there is a Home:Pet:Sex Toy category. Ew. — Cedar Park, Jul 08 2010"   

       "And it contains three whole ideas. — kaz, Jul 08 2010"   

       One of benfrost's more deviant phases, perhaps?
blissmiss, Jul 16 2010

       [rcarty], you know what they say - "don't sweat the small stuff ..."
8th of 7, Jul 16 2010


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