Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
The phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.

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Anonymous revenge for a busy world.
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(+8, -2)
  [vote for,

We live on a busy street in a yuppie town. The yuppies got mad at the speeding cars so they put in speed bumps to slow them down. The workers going to work got mad at the speed bumps and started honking their horns as they drove down the street to express their resentment to the residents. At times, we had an egg on the front porch to lob at passing honkers but we weren't confident of hitting our target, and we didn't want to get shot either.

Thus spake EggZooka! The EggZooka! is designed to launch eggs from a safe distance and good vantage point. It can be mounted on a rooftop, or in a window, and can be operated remotely, to effectively target offenders and safely evade retaliation. The EggZooka! has an internal foam core to protect eggs. Store eggs for an indefinite period of time to enhance their effect!

The O'Blivions, Jul 03 2001

Backyard Ballistics http://www.frii.com/~bsimon/backyard.html
Rmutt only slightly regrets the fact that he's outgrown this kind of foolishness... [rmutt, Jul 03 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

The Funnelator http://www.chronolo...mpany/vernal99.html
This rather pathetic example was the best thing I could find. Where are the professionals when you need them? [rmutt, Jul 03 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/ Mozer - monty python and those crazy Oxford guys! [PiledHigherandDeeper, Oct 04 2004]


       A politician would try to prevent any UK sales.
AndyKnott, Jul 03 2001

       so who do you claim allegiance to? the yuppies or the workers? there is a film somewhere in this.
benfrost, Jul 04 2001

       Is there a Brian in your family? ala Videodrome?
benfrost, Jul 04 2001

       unabubba: try sugar in his gas tank. or vaseline on his windshield.
mihali, Jul 04 2001

       what you want to do is launch a large net to entangle the car (stop the doors opening etc. especialy good against convertables...) or posibley a mixture of oil and little sharp things to make the car lose controll and its tyers...
RobertKidney, Jul 05 2001

       Look all over the internet for potato guns: spudgun should be a good keyword.   

       The compressed air type of gun can easily fire an egg-size potato chunk 200 yards or more. Simply built a self-discarding sabot to hold the egg in position and protect it from the massive acceleration, and you have a perfect device.   

       Bonus: this gun will shoot ANYTHING you can shove in the barrel, with the exception of iron rods, hardened concrete and liquid water (which cannot be compressed). Some examples include:   

       -Barbie dolls -toilet paper -a handful of jellybeans with a doughnut as a sabot (look it up!) -flaming barbie dolls -flaming toilet paper -m-80 firecrackers (tricky) -spam -rocks and marbles -ping-pong balls filled with ammonium triiodide -dead rats/snakes/etc. -road flares -wooden slugs -glowing chemoluminescent sticks -shaving cream in the can -"D" cell batteries -light bulbs   

       the list goes on and on....
Macwarrior, Mar 22 2003

       a friend of mine and I built a potato gun out of plastic pvc piping... Our target: the ass who sped infront of his house at night, causing 3 car accidents and countless mailbox decapitations. We struck the rear of the passenger side, permanently imbedding a potato in his door... he had to have the spud professionally removed.
colaaddict, Mar 23 2003

       How about a "cow-tapult"? Oh wait...that's already baked by Monty Python.
muzer, Oct 27 2003

       its been baked, ive made a pneumatic airgun and modified the barrel to launch eggs, works like a charm, furure egging in a couple days, and no the muzzle velocity is not too high
morbiddesire, Feb 17 2004

       wow I like its a gun whith edable bullets cool!
crash, Jul 01 2007


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