Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Emacs For Microwave Ovens

Slight advance in microwave oven user interfaces
  [vote for,

I rarely use microwaves to prepare food for myself, though I do use them for others. Anyone who has used most microwaves will be aware that they tend to have rather basic user interfaces, not even as sophisticated as a line editor. If you make a mistake, at least on the example in this house, you have little option but to delete everything and start again.

If they are going to have digital interfaces, and they needn't but usually have, they should at least be up to the level of, well I was going to say something like the FORTH line editor but actually sod it, Emacs. I want Emacs for microwaves, controllable via a touch-sensitive screen displaying a QWERTY keyboard, to enter the necessary information to nuke a spud. I want it to tell me the phase of the Moon, act as a therapist and have a built-in adventure game. This would allow me to program the microwave using a calendar, store different microwave regimes for different foods and prepare special meals for the full moon.

This could be done by interfacing ancient computer hardware to microwave ovens.

nineteenthly, Oct 14 2017

Raspberry Pi microwave oven https://madebynatha...-powered-microwave/
Could do this. Also makes this unnecessary most of the time. [notexactly, Mar 18 2018]


       It really wouldn't be that difficult to put USB, WiFi and an RJ45 connector on the back of the box. Microcontrollers are already starting to support the hardware and protocol stacks at chip level. Then it could link to anything.   

       You could, for example, link it to a PDP-4 ... but then why bother with a microwave oven ? Just put the food on the top of the PDP-4 and watch it sizzle. "Fried bit-slice, anyone ?"
8th of 7, Oct 14 2017

       A Honeywell-316 would be appropriate.
nineteenthly, Oct 14 2017

       Unless you've edited FORTRAN using George 3, you're just playing at it.
8th of 7, Oct 15 2017

       No IOT-capable microwave for me, thanks. I do not want the North Koreans, or worse yet, some basement-dwelling Linux fan hacking in to nuke my food to the wrong temperature.
RayfordSteele, Oct 16 2017

       Could be worse, could be vi.
piluso, Oct 16 2017

       //Unless you've edited FORTRAN using George 3, you're just playing at it.//   

       Pah. Unless you have personally removed Alphabetti Spaghetti from the innermost workings of a Babbage Difference Engine, you've merely dabbled.   

       And, like [Rayfo], I am not enamoured of things that talk to other things behind my back. One day, when we have working computers, it may be feasible.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 17 2017

       Nice idea, though I'd prefer Vim, and why stop at microwaves? All domestic appliances should be fully command-line driven.
zen_tom, Oct 18 2017

       ... and support macros and shell scripts.
8th of 7, Oct 18 2017

       The interface should be that of a mid-'70's text adventure game:

> It is dark
>>>turn on light
>The light is on. You see the inside of a metal box with a sealed container at its centre
>>>look container
>The container says "M&S Lasagne for one" on it
>>>cook lasagne
>The lasagne is cooking
hippo, Oct 18 2017

       >The microwave interior is encrusted with a hard jewel-like substance , the resulf of a lack of cleaning over a millenia.
> Clean microwave
>>Beg pardon?
> Wipe substance
>> I can't see any substance here.
> Disinfect microwave
>>Beg pardon?
>Close microwave door
>>It is pitch black. You are likely to be eaten by a Grue.
>Open microwave
>>The microwave opens. A light inside turns on, revealing the microwave interior, and the kitchen. The microwave interior is encrusted with a hard jewel-like substance , the resulf of a lack of cleaning over a millenia.
The kitchen is sparse but functional.
>Format Microwave
>................... ...................... .....done!
c:\>run cook.exe
c:\>file not found
RayfordSteele, Oct 18 2017

       Hmm, is there any scope for amusing fiction written in the style of a MUD session ?   

       > The lasagne is cooked
>>> open door
> The door is open. The light is on. You see the inside of a metal box with a sealed container at its centre.
>>>pick up container
> The container has exploded. Your hands and face are covered in scalding lasagne. You can not see. You are in pain. You can not use your hands. You have1325 Wound points. You are still hungry. You have 83 Strength points. You have 213 Gold pieces. You have 0Healing potions. You have 0 Food items.
> There is a Dragon here. The Dragon is angry. The Dragon is very angry. The Dragon is shouting at you. The Dragon is telling you to stop screaming, and what the bloody hell have you done to her kitchen ? The Dragon asks if you are not capable of reading a set of simple instructions. The Dragon does not care how much it hurts, it bloody well serves you right, now get on and clean the mess up. The Dragon does not know why she married you or what she ever saw in you, the Dragon's mother was right. The Dragon should have listened to her mother.
> You have been struck a right ding alongside the ear with a heavy blunt object. There is a Le Creuset cast iron frying pan here. You can not see. You are in great pain. You can not use your hands. You are bleeding from a head wound. The Dragon has left. The Dragon has taken all your Gold pieces and gone to the pub. You have2108 Wound points. You are still hungry. You have 17 Strength points. You have 0 Gold pieces. You have 0Healing potions. You have 0 Food items. You feel your life ebbing away.
> Session suspended due to user inactivity.

8th of 7, Oct 18 2017

       ^ +
FlyingToaster, Oct 18 2017

       Oh, well, if you like that, we'll have a go at fiction then.
8th of 7, Oct 18 2017

       >You are amazed at the badly-written passages all alike.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 18 2017

       Everyone's a critic. Just try writing a D&D programme in BASIC that lacks even an explicit IF ... THEN ... ELSE construct, on a machine with 32kB of RAM and an 8 bit CPU.
8th of 7, Oct 18 2017

       Ah, the luxury of 32K!
nineteenthly, Oct 18 2017

       //lacks IF...THEN...ELSE...construct// ON X GOTO 100,200, N00 was a fair substitute, though I suppose needs some data plumbing to use to full effect.
zen_tom, Oct 18 2017

       Why is it just assumed that the control should be digital? I feel much finer control could be achieved with an analog system, obviously some nice glowing vacuum tubes are a positive addition to any domestic appliance. There are further advantages, the sort of voltages a cavity magnetron uses could be manipulated directly, no clunky off/on relays between the low and high voltage sections. Control should be via a series of nice ceramic knobs and an oscilloscope.
bs0u0155, Mar 19 2018

       Will there be a big We-Belong-Dead knife switch with a brown Bakelite handle ?
8th of 7, Mar 20 2018

       Oh yes, must have an oscilloscope.
RayfordSteele, Mar 20 2018

       Presumably there's a version of the Interocitor that can perform cookery functions.
8th of 7, Mar 21 2018


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