Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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Froggy Amplifier

Get more babes!
  [vote for,

I was out on my deck tonight, listening to the numerous frogs (Pseudacris regilla), in full chorus, vying for a mate. You will hear them croaking loudly, trying to out-croak the others. I suddenly heard a very, very loud croak. Looking around, I saw nothing. I continued listening and discovered a small green frog, no larger than the end of my thumb, under the deck of my lawnmower. The lawnmower deck made his voice much larger than the neighboring toads.

(What some guys won’t do to lure a female)

I would like to make a small plastic house with an attached megaphone for my little green troubadours. They could crawl inside and belt out their mating call. Every little female (Pseudacris regilla) for miles around would hear them and then I would have even more froggy songs at night after the babies are born.

Klaatu, Mar 03 2013

Pseudacris regilla call http://www.californ...regilla.sounds.html
Caution! Auto-plays frog calls [Klaatu, Mar 03 2013]


       That would be cute :-) [+]
Sunstone, Mar 03 2013

       Yes, this amphibtheatre must be built.   

       Two Buns Up [+][+]
Grogster, Mar 04 2013

       I know an Italian pianist whose friend, Georgio, was/is (?) an organist and a total perfectionist to the point of mental illness. This tale is vastly improved by a softly spoken Italilan accent, but I'm afraid I'll have to leave it to your imagination.   

       Georgio was recording each evening for a while in a chapel on a lake in Italy - one had to take a boat to get to it. One evening he had got to a particularly quiet piece. Unfortunately it was that time of year when the frogs started making a lot of noise (insert Italianated frog impression here). He played the piece a few times, but he never managed a whole run of it without the frogs in the background. Apparently he was furious and rowed off home, probably for a bottle of wine or two.   

       The next evening he returned, bringing with him quite a lot of potassium bromide. This was tipped into the lake, and by the time he was sitting at the organ ready to record, there was total silence. He played the piece beautifully and was just feeling satisfied holding the long, quiet last note when, 'whoooo-whooooo' came from an owl in the roof somewhere.   

       Apparently this was one of the last straws for Georgio's poor mind which, I gather, was never the same again.   

       I can't promise the story holds up to full scientific analysis of how many rowing-boatsful of bromide are needed... etc, but that's the story as I heard it. I like the idea though [+]
TomP, Mar 04 2013

       [+] love it! Maybe could have a pagoda-type design to accomodate the megaphone sticking out of the roof!
xandram, Mar 04 2013

       I don't know if my little green friends have the capacity to think, but lately there seems to be a war of technology going on. It started in my neighbor's tree. A Northern Pacific Treefrog started by climbing up into the taller branches to send his "hey babes, look at me" croaking into the far reaches of the neighborhood.   

       Then my frog figured out that the deck of my mower made a great croak enhancer.   

       Last night, around 01:00 AM, I awoke to a frog in my bedroom (or, at least it sounded that way). The downspout for my rain gutter runs down the corner of my bedroom to a PVC connector that then runs under my garden, and then to the curb. This little green genius crawled in from the curb, up the PVC drain and into my downspout.   

       I don't know if treefrogs can think, but they seem to be learning ingenious ways to boost their chances of securing a mate.   

       [2fries] I wish I had thought of that for a title for the idea.   

       [TomP] That story stands on its own. No scientific analysis required.   

       [xandram] After last night, I'm tempted to make it in the shape of a frog with a gramaphone horn coming out of its arse. But, a pagoda *would* make it more ornamental in a garden.
Klaatu, Mar 04 2013

       Funny, now that you mention it, the woodpeckers around here have taken to pecking the street-light enclosures because they are so much louder than the trees.   

       That not evolution behavior, that cuz woodpeckers be dumb.
Alterother, Mar 04 2013

       Well, all those repeated head impacts have to have some effect...
normzone, Mar 04 2013

       Eventually, you'd wind up with a population of female frogs that only responded to these amplified vocalizations. Then one year you send your froggy amplifiers off to the froggy amplifier service engineer and forget to reinstall them in time. Next year, no frogs. Flies flourish in the frogless environment, allowing swifts to evolve to enormous sizes. The giant swifts, having exhausted the abundance of flies, turn to small mammals instead. Mouse and rat numbers plummet, leading to widespread starvation of the local snake population which, crazed by lack of food and terrorized by giant rat-eating swifts, invade human dwellings in unprecendented and unpostcedented numbers.   

       You're sowing the seeds of an environmental cataclysm.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2013

       ^solved by snake-eating gorillas which freeze to death in winter.
mitxela, Mar 04 2013

       //that cuz woodpeckers be dumb//   

       If'n they's dumb, then they's dumb on a schedule cuz they only do it come mating season.   

       //Eventually, you'd wind up with a population of female frogs that only responded to these amplified vocalizations ... You're sowing the seeds of an environmental cataclysm.//   

       Yes but, how else can we know for sure?   

       That's exactly what they said before they introduced chipmunks to Latvia. Ever wondered why there aren't any whales in Latvia? No, thought not.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 04 2013

       I missed this somehow. Bravo, wonderful you froggie you.
blissmiss, Mar 04 2013

       Snake-eating gorillas which freeze to death in winter? That needs its own idea. And possibly it's own halfbakery category. Public: Snake nuisance: Self-limiting deterrent
not_only_but_also, May 13 2013

       It's a brilliant idea. I just added another crumb to the two croissants, so hope you're seeing this, and continuing to post ideas. [+]
xenzag, Jul 19 2020


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