Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Georgi Markov vaccination service

  (+11, -1)(+11, -1)
(+11, -1)
  [vote for,

Without wishing to in any way to downplay the remarkable achievement of creating and distributing Covid-19 vaccines, the delivery mechanism - i.e. standing in a queue outside your local pharmacy waiting to be jabbed in the arm - may not be exciting enough for some.

Thus, for a small (large) fee, this service allows you to play the part of dissident Bulgarian cold-war defector Georgi Markov. As you wait for a bus on Waterloo Bridge, dressed in authentic replicas of the cheap 1970's clothes Markov wore that day, you will feel a sharp stabbing pain in your leg and see a shady figure flee, dropping their umbrella - and thus know that you have been vaccinated.

If this service is successful, other role-play vaccination scenarios will be developed, for example the old man with the blowpipe in "Tintin and the Broken Ear" or being visited by a John Travolta lookalike for a reenaction of the injection scene from “Pulp Fiction”.
hippo, Jun 20 2021

The death of Georgi Markov http://news.bbc.co....2514000/2514187.stm
[hippo, Jun 20 2021]

Tintin and the Broken Ear https://www.tintin....bums/the-broken-ear
[hippo, Jun 20 2021]

Trainspotting air gun scene https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Sdpkec-Rj4I
[xenzag, Jun 25 2021]

Vlad Tepes https://en.wikipedi...ki/Vlad_the_Impaler
Not medically qualified to administer vaccination jabs. [DrBob, Jun 26 2021]


       Can I get mine cut with some kind of mildly narcotic substance and do the whole tying off my arm, slapping the injection site and doing the injection by candlelight, or something of that nature? Medical professionals could maintain an opium den, or some such.
normzone, Jun 23 2021

       As opposed to the more stochastic Andrey Markov vaccination service, where each position in the queue has some fixed set of chances that the people in each spot get to move to a different location in the queue, one or more of which might involve actually getting vaccinated, after which their chance of proceeding to the exit is fixed as 1, via the sink. There is every chance that some positions in the queue will contain multiple people after a certain number of goes, but it should all even out in the end.
zen_tom, Jun 23 2021

       [normz-1] excellent, yes - I’m sure that would appeal to many
[zen] I like it - very niche, and would increase vaccination rates among mathematicians
hippo, Jun 24 2021

       [Approved +] Don't forget the air gun shooting scene in Trainspotting: "do ya have tha beast in yer sights Missh Moneypenny?"
xenzag, Jun 25 2021

       Conditional bun provided that assurance is given that the Vlad Tepes scenario is permanently off the table.
DrBob, Jun 26 2021

       Looking online, a typical vaccine dose seems to be 0.5ml (the largest I found was 3ml, 2ml is not uncommon, the singular smallest value was 0.05ml - which is possibly a typo).   

       These are all much larger than the umbrella applicator pellet could carry -apparently less than 0.0005ml.   

       You're going to need a tranquilizer dart-style projectile. Given the use case, a retractable needle on these projectiles would be a benefit.   

       The calf, as a large muscle, is possibly a reasonable target for certain vaccinations. I'm not convinced the heart (à la Pulp Fiction) would be ideal.
Loris, Jun 26 2021

       I'll take mine in a dirty bathroom with a rubber hose across from a furtive businessman and an underweight woman wearing powerful perfume. How much for the full perp-walk-and-cell treatment?
Voice, Jun 26 2021

       Could this be scaled up to biologiocal warefare? Well, a virus isn't alive but scaling up the right molecular fractions, an air force could dose/douse whole cities with the right immulogical stimulant.
wjt, Jul 11 2021


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