Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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JerkyTape

Like BubbleTape, only meatier!
  (+27, -1)(+27, -1)(+27, -1)
(+27, -1)
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Basically form the jerky into thin, flat 6ft pieces and roll them into a spiral. Place into a plasic container that allows the jerky to come out and be ripped off like the ever so popular Bubble tape.
generaltso, Feb 14 2007

doner kebab strips http://donerkebab.a...04.fr/viandeweb.jpg
[po, Feb 15 2007]

More things in tape form!!! Money_20Tape
Purchase yer jerky with this. [Giblet, Apr 13 2007]

[link]






       I'm not sure which 6-foot long cut of meat you are intending to machine this piece of jerky from. Bearing in mind, of course that it is important to eliminate fat in the meat to be <I hate this term> "Jerked" </IHTT>.
Custardguts, Feb 15 2007
  

       Hungry [po]?
theleopard, Feb 15 2007
  

       OK- I think it would sell. +
xandram, Feb 15 2007
  

       Probably best to start with an animal with long straight muscles.   

       Giraffe neck jerky and whale jerky come to mind.   

       Of course rolling jerky would strike me as rather difficult, the stuff is rather rigid.
Galbinus_Caeli, Feb 15 2007
  

       Stan Laurel would've liked this, lordy knows how many shoes he ate.
skinflaps, Feb 15 2007
  

       I'm not sure why but that picture is quite disturbing Po.
jhomrighaus, Feb 15 2007
  

       Eating it is worse.
skinflaps, Feb 15 2007
  

       The kids would love this. And since so much of the jerky on the market today is the processed "stick" variety, I don't see a problem with pressing it into tape.
Noexit, Feb 15 2007
  

       The way you do it is that you process it with plenty of nitrates, sodium phosphates, and other chemicals in order to fuse the sections together and make it more pliable. Thats why every stick of Slim Jim™ brand beef jerky looks identical. Before it is packaged it probably comes off of one giant roll that is pressed from a big bowl of chopped up mystery meat.
Jscotty, Feb 15 2007
  

       So that stuff is considered jerky too? Sorry, I was confused, I have not eaten jerky in any form for more than twenty years.
Galbinus_Caeli, Feb 15 2007
  

       Mmm - I love jerky, and this dispenser would be perfect. Need one of those little serrated metal edges to tear a piece off. Actually it would be interesting to apply an edible adhesive to the tape - perhaps gravy-based? Then you could stick a piece of jerky-tape to your lunchbox and you'd have it for handy access!
rossgk, Feb 16 2007
  

       \\Eating it is worse.\\ Even worse is trying to remember whatever it was that made you think that buying one was a good idea.
hidden truths, Feb 17 2007
  

       There are some new brands that are much softer than the old shoe leather kind.
xandram, Feb 17 2007
  

       Properly made jerky, filed to a point, can be used as a weapon. You could stab somebody to death, then eat the evidence.   

       Mmm. Teriyaki.
elhigh, Feb 19 2007
  

       [jhomrighaus], regarding [po]'s link, better a doner jerky party than Donner Party jerky.
normzone, Feb 19 2007
  

       "thin, flat 6ft pieces and roll them into a spiral" Erk, must be that "chopped and formed" quasi-jerky or maybe anaconda jerky.
half, Feb 19 2007
  

       Escargot jerky, made from compressed snails, served in a six-foot roll from a snail-shaped dispenser. Garlic-butter flavour optional.
m_Al_com, Feb 21 2007
  

       I'd eat that. Actually, I wouldn't, but I'd make and sell it for other people to eat.
angel, Feb 21 2007
  

       "What's this?"
"Pemican. If you're still hungry, drink some water. It expands in your stomach."
  

       And [po]'s picture is of a spit of gyro meat - ground lamb (usually also with chicken) formed into a cone. It's really quite good with feta cheese, lettuce, tomato, wrapped in a pita, and slathered in tzatziki. You can even find fast food restaurants in American malls that sell it.
shapu, Feb 21 2007
  

       And next in line, introduce the Pez corned beef cube dispenser.
skinflaps, Feb 21 2007
  

       Now that, I'd go for, [skinflaps].
Jerky looks and tastes like dog chews. How do I know how dog chews taste?....
  

       ...well I just do, alright!
squeak, Feb 21 2007
  

       I like it.   

       In order to get 6 or more feet to make the strip, you could probably overlap longish pieces of meat and just squish them together before you smoke/dry them. Although, come to think of it, a piece of beef tenderloin might be close to long enough anyways. Who knows? It might spur the cattle industry to breed longer cows. Haha.
Agamemnon, Feb 21 2007
  

       It turns out much of jerky now a days is made from a sort of meat-paste anyway, thus making a 6ft long strip quite easy to make.
generaltso, Apr 12 2007
  

       Put a cow in a lathe, and shave off layers as in plywood manufacture
spidermother, Apr 13 2007
  

       One of my old survival books said that was the way to make meat for pemmican--dry a chunk of meat, then shave around and around the outside.
baconbrain, Apr 13 2007
  
      
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