Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Neanderthrill Picnic Set

Back to basics picnic set
  (+9, -2)
(+9, -2)
  [vote for,

Here's what you get:

One portable, fold up stove, that looks like a pile of half burnt wood, but carefully conceals a mantle, connected with a bark encrusted hose to a gas bottle which is in turn disguised as a small boulder.

Two fire starting twigs, which, when rubbed together, activate a piezoelectric crystal causing a large spark to leap off into your "stove".

Cutlery in the form of ceramic knives and forks that look like razor edged flints and sharpened sticks.

Easy-clean teflon coated, stiffened fabric plates, made to look like large leaves.

Pre-cooked range of "Food-Fit for Caves", Meals Ready to Roast.

Primeval noises of the forest soundtrack to play whilst dragging your partner backwards by the hair to dinner, using the reinforced "Easy-Pull" wig (included)

xenzag, Jul 25 2006


       Absolutely pointless. [+]
hidden truths, Jul 25 2006

       Also one pre-hobbled pig to hunt.
moomintroll, Jul 25 2006

       Um, why not use *real* razor edge flints...? In fact, I'd take this all one step back - sanitized primitive implements.   

       After all, banana leaves are widely used as plates in India and points east - no need for plates that look like leaves.
DrCurry, Jul 25 2006

       + Ug og.   

       Banana leaves and no eating utensils at all. Indonesian take-out, and damned good.
baconbrain, Jul 28 2006

       Note - this product is now available in a “Flintstone Brexit” version, featuring red white and blue flames, and is fully endorsed by the UK’s Trump Moron equivalent aka Bonkers Boris.
xenzag, Jun 22 2019

       Easily remarketed as US or french versions.
Skewed, Jun 22 2019

       This seems baked by most American food.
RayfordSteele, Jun 22 2019


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