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A network of satellites tasked with
tracking obnoxious individuals,
including but not limited to
politicians, pundits, middle
managers with delusions of
grandeur, professional athletes,
and, upon receiving the proper
signal, dispatching a Pie Delivery
Vehicle, or PDV, to intercept
face with a cream pie. The PDV
would rely on a mechanism similar
Space Ship One for reentry. Its
fuselage would be just large enough
to contain a single cream pie and a
catapult mechanism to fling the pie
at the target once the PDV glides to
near ground level.
This scheme could be funded by a
web site similar to that proposed by
Public Subscription Assassination,
specifically, the pie version
in the annotations.
Public Subscription Assination
[JakePatterson, Nov 15 2004]
a halfbakery classic [RayfordSteele, Nov 15 2004]
||[+] for the idea. [++] for the "Aliens" reference.
||Someone, somewhere is actually working on a more sinister version of this - effectively a pod of unmanned Predator-type aircraft in orbit. They can be released individually and arrive at any point on the planet within fifteen minutes. It is unclear whether they are to be armed or not. There are no references to this on the net and you didn't hear it from me ;-). I would [+] the real thing as well if it delivered pies!
||So... you slow the pies down from orbital speed before allowing them to impact someone you wish ill of... I don't get it. I mean as long as they don't burn up completely on reentry, wouldn't you want them to have most of that enormous velocity for a more powerful smite?
||And if not, wouldn't the cost of baking pies in orbit make a slightly larger number of dedicated, but ground-based PDVs be more cost-effective?
||Presumably the re-entry heat could be used to power the oven to bake them?