Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Superficial Intelligence

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.



Politicians lose a day's pay

  [vote for,

On both side of the Atlantic* politicians are having a bit of a barney over the Wall/Br*xit.

Seeing as they paid for coming up with solutions - and they aren't doing it- I suggest all of them lose one day's pay, as an incentive.

The money is never given back,it goes to worthy charities, with voters choosing which ones.

* except the South Atlantic.

not_morrison_rm, Jan 18 2019

AskReddit: [Serious] Americans, would you be in support of putting a law in place that government officials, such as senators and the president, go without pay during shutdowns like this while other federal employees do? Why, or why not? https://www.reddit....u_be_in_support_of/
The people complaining about it being tagged [serious] all thought the top answers would be in favor of such a policy, but the top answers actually explain why such a policy would be bad—it would disproportionately harm less-rich government officials, so the more-rich ones could use it as a threat against them [notexactly, Jan 22 2019]

No fix = no funds https://www.telegra...sa-mays-leadership/
It puts a solution or it gets the hose [not_morrison_rm, Jan 26 2019]

Government Forfeits Government_20Forfeits
Words fail my hatred of these fatback grosseros [saker, Feb 07 2019]


       Could they not just keep the pay, and lose one day of their life instead ?   

       We suggest tomorrow would be good, starting at dawn, so the firing squads can see clearly.
8th of 7, Jan 18 2019

       I think that the lose a day's pay approach is Tory- favouring, as my impression (without any research to back it up) is that a greater number of Tory MPs are independently wealthy. So, rather than deprive them of their money, we should deprive them of something that is equally distributed across MPs: their liberty. Simply construct an oubliette, capable of accommodating 643 humanoids (Sinn Féin's abstentionist policy gets them a bye from this). Each hour, throw into the oubliette the MP with the largest majority - the thinking, such as it is, being that the larger your majority, the less likely you are to ever consider compromise or, indeed, reality. Repeat the process until it's Stephen Gethins, at which point he can unilaterally do, well, whatever the fuck he wants. This means that we will have a clear solution to the current crisis within 26 days, well ahead of the end of March. Assuming, of course, we can construct an oubliette in time.   

       Details: the oubliette would be fairly traditional, food would be lowered daily in a bucket, and they rub the lotion on their skin or else they get the hose again. MPs will be let out following implementation of the agreed or determined course of action.
calum, Jan 18 2019

       This would work nicely if the oubliette were fashioned from, for example, a disused deep coal mine with all the shaft equipment removed.   

       // food would be lowered daily in a bucket, //   

       We see no objection to this, as long as it's not lowered down close enough for any survivors to reach it.   

       // they rub the lotion on their skin or else they get the hose again. //   

       They are more likely to drink the lotion, but anyway ... tell us more about the hose.   

       // MPs will be let out //   

       ... and that's the point where it all goes wrong, of course. Capping the shaft with steel and concrete and then just walking away seems a much better option.   

       An alternative to this is placing the offenders in a nuclear waste repository. The longer they stay, the more dose they get, and the greater the irreversible lifetime risk of a range of unpleasant diseases. Over time, they will become progressively more debilitated and ill. This should encourage a modicum of flexibility in their attitudes. The doors will be re-opened when a unanimous consensus is achieved, and a binding agreement signed by all those present, or at least still capable of holding a writing instrument.   

       As an additional inducement, prior to the doors being slammed, they would be informed that on their release they will have to wait for treatment on trolleys in hospital corridors, like everyone else.
8th of 7, Jan 18 2019

       In a similar vein, I've long thought that MPs should only be paid the average wage of the country. That way, less would want the job for the money and only those who actually give a crap would become politicians; AND it would give them an incentive to make things better for everyone (or forcing the 1% to act better & share the wealth to their workers...), thus raising the average and so their own income.
neutrinos_shadow, Jan 20 2019

       What you'll end up with is politicians financially motivated by corruption and insider trading rather than paychecks.
Voice, Jan 20 2019

       And that differs from the current system exactly how ... ?
8th of 7, Jan 20 2019

       I think they should have their campaign money frozen until the government reopens.
RayfordSteele, Jan 21 2019

       I see, as if in a vision, the Secret Service so debilitated by hunger and lack of vitamins, they are unable to cope with assassins...   

       5 nanoseconds after that, the opposition party stops blocking federal employees wages.
not_morrison_rm, Jan 21 2019

       In the UK there is a political party that does nothing as they never take their seats in Parliament, yet they get their full salaries, expenses, offices in London and paid staff costing millions in total. That party is the called Sinn Fein/IRA. It's cheaper to do this, to keep them happy than the alternative of them being terrorists and criminals again - blowing everthing up, robbing banks, dealing drugs etc and or course murdering people en masse as part of their extreme sectarian campaign.
xenzag, Jan 22 2019

       Should any of these methods fail to deliver the desired results I suggest a process where a politician is chosen at random along with a punishment, also chosen at random (from a list that I and probably [8th] will soon compile), and the two put together on the 15th of each month on national TV.   

       Edited: My goodness, wherever did that come from?
whatrock, Jan 22 2019

       This place must be bugged, Daily Telegraph today "Conservative donors refuse to hand over cash in 'disgust' over Theresa May's ..."   

not_morrison_rm, Jan 26 2019

       // This place must be bugged //   

       Well, yes and no ... this is all the product of [Ian Tindale]'s deranged imagination. It's all inside his head ...
8th of 7, Jan 26 2019

       //Seeing as they paid for coming up with solutions//

See, this is one of the many things that puzzles me about democracy. If electors think that they are looking for someone to solve existing problems, why do they keep voting for people whose only skill is inventing new problems for which a solution must be found?
DrBob, Jan 30 2019

       Therefore the problem is clearly the electorate ...
8th of 7, Jan 30 2019

       It's a fair cop
not_morrison_rm, Jan 30 2019

       Dunno where my previous anno went. Oh well.   

       <rant> I can't stand any politicians of any stripe. By definition they are scum-sucking, hypocritical, corrupt, amoral fuckers who want one thing - power. Give them it, they'll only want more.   

       When that axis of evil, George Dubya & Tony "I'd never get tired of pistol whipping your face into a bloody pulp" Blair, were busy invading Iraq for their nefarious porpoises, I halfbaked this <link>.   

       Slowly boiling them all in vast vats of rat fat is too good for the bastard criminals they all are. And I'm a pacifist. </rant>
saker, Feb 08 2019

       // Slowly boiling them all in vast vats of rat fat is too good for the bastard criminals they all are. //   

       True ... but it might be something to be getting on with until a better idea turns up.   

       Boiling fat might not be the best thing; it would kill them rather too quickly. May we be permitted to make a case for partially scalding them all in vast vats of rat fat ? That would be extremely unhygienic as well as excruciatingly painful, with a good chance that with a severely compromised dermis they will then contract severe infections resulting in a slow and agonizing death over a period of weeks.
8th of 7, Feb 08 2019

       Some things are more difficult than they look.   

       I respectfully suggest that you hold back the rat fat vats until you have tried, at least once, putting yourself through the process of standing as a candidate for a political party, even at a local level and in an unwinnable electorate, just to understand the pressures involved.   

       What was it that Arwen said about mortals? "I used to think them foolish and wicked, but now I pity them." Not all of them, obviously. Some of them probably deserve the vats. Others, not so much.
pertinax, Feb 08 2019

       The "others" would no doubt benefit from a brief incarceration in a "re-education" camp.   

       // the process of standing as a candidate for a political party //   

       We have observed said process at uncomfortably close range on more than one occasion. Our conclusion is that it is specifically engineered to winnow out the honest and above all even marginally competent individuals as quickly as possible, then elevating the venal dross to positions of authority.   

       We will admit that it is perhaps not so much the candidates as the system that is fundamentally and irreparably flawed and corrupt, but visiting random pointless suffering on everyone will deter all but the most power-hungry, thus ensuring that when the system collapses and the summary executions commence, those strung up from lamp-posts alongside the lawyers and journalists will be richly deserving of their fate.
8th of 7, Feb 08 2019

       //"re-education" camp//

Mis-read this as ""re-education" carp". It sounded quite exciting & I was going to ask for more details but then I re-read it & was all disappointed. :(
DrBob, Feb 08 2019

       // It sounded quite exciting //   

       It sounds a bit fishy to us. In the fin-al analysis it's probably much the same plaice.
8th of 7, Feb 08 2019

       //Mis-read this as ""re-education" carp".   

       If you were to look at the Fish Shaving notion..
not_morrison_rm, Feb 08 2019


back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle