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Stinky Car Alert

To alert the car in front of you that they are polluting!
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Ever get stuck behind a really stinky car or truck? Well, I do all the time. With this alert device that acts a lot like an air quality detecting bullhorn or a megaphone, you can alert the car in front of you that they stink up to high heaven! This device will have intake valves that could test the air coming from the front of you vehicle. Whenever levels of CO, O3, Sulfur, and other stinky gases are too high, it will sound off and scream such stored phrases as "Peeeuuu, you stink!", "What crawled up your tailpipe and died?" and a whole slough of profanities to the car in front of you. You can also fit this mechanism with a printer, a GPS, and a camera to take the important data down so that you can report any big corporate polluters. It's a lot like a traveling air quality nose with an attitude. Of course this would also have to have a middle finger.
cheebug, Apr 03 2001

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       I would like the system to able to control the fan on my vent/heater/air conditioning. If a stinky cloud is detected, shut off the fan...or at least stop drawing in outside air until the stink dissipates.   

       This feature would have spared my nose (and my health?) three times this morning during my drive to work!
randydarden, Apr 03 2001
  

       A number of newer luxury cars do shut off their vents if they detect anything...malodorous. And most of them have active carbon or electronic filtering systems as well. Should be a matter of time until this stuff moves down into less expensive cars.
Brendan, Apr 03 2001
  

       With the number of SUVs in the US, you only need one for the whole country.
PT, Jun 06 2002
  

       btw (yes, I am a chemistry pedant): neither CO nor O3 are stinky gases. they are both odourless. What you smell is a combination of sulphur and unburnt hydrocarbons[not carbohydrates, thanks Star Chaser, I am Austrian, i.e. dyslexic with regards to the English language]
Saruman, Jun 06 2002
  

       Hydrocarbons, you might mean? I doubt that sport futility vehicles are farting their way down the road, even with as big asses as their drivers often are...
StarChaser, Jun 07 2002
  

       If the exhaust pipe were placed at the front of a car instead of the rear, then the driver would bea able to smell their own level of pollution.
MichaelW, Jun 12 2002
  

       What, you think the drivers are completely oblivious to the reek? They just don't care.
Tabbyclaw, Jun 02 2004
  
      
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