Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Storm chasing suit

An essential for the serious meteorologist
  [vote for,

Most serious storm chasers (i.e. those lacking an obvious death wish)seem to have a curious blind spot when it comes to suitable garments.

While they ride around in semi-hardened vehicles, with polycarbonate secondary glazing and skirts to prevent uplift, their garb tends toward the dollar store end of the market - T-shirts, baseball caps, and jeans.

This is fine as long as they're inside their vehicle.

However, as they seem to get out quite frequently - in order to take photos, or just gawp at the spectacular weather -they tend to get the "full benefit", which includes horizontal rain, hailstones of golf ball size and beyond, and airborne farm machinery (occasionally still inside the building it's stored in).

Not much is going to help if a farmhouse lands on you (other than the standard protective measure in Tornado Alley of "hoping really hard that it lands on someone else"), but for smaller stuff, BorgCo propose offering a modular range of protective equipment.

From the head down, firstly there are several variants of headgear, either resembling a military "steel helmet" (Stahlhelm style for seriously hardcore Nazi stormchasers) or a motorcycle helmet, incorporating a comms headset compatible with both typical short range radios and mobile telephony.

The upper body is covered by a waterproof "flak jacket" with a high collar, designed to work with the helmet to protect the neck from projectiles from all directions. Broad shoulder pads can be clipped on to the multi-function epaulettes after exiting the vehicle. Long and short sleeved versions can be supplied.

The trousers are of a similar construction, but have special odour-containing and stain-concealing undergarment features for those occasions where the storm chaser not only successfully chases the storm, but actually catches it.

The footwear is engineered for running away very fast on wet and slippery surfaces.

Gloves - including an optional plasticised, waterproof "catcher's mitt" for catching giant hail moving at speed - are of course available too.

If you invest in the complete outfit, then we'll supply a set of dog tags with your personal information embossed, and print your details in multiple locations inside each item, which makes it so much easier for law enforcement and the coroner when detached portions later turn up scattered over a wide track* each side of where the tornado passed.

Colour choices vary from the recommended "Hi-Vis" scheme to solid or patterned, including camouflage, Field Grey, and Imperial Stormtrooper gloss white.

For copyright reasons, the "witch" outfit complete with ruby slippers is not currently available.

*You may very well not be in Kansas any more at this point; at least, not all of you.

8th of 7, Apr 25 2018

This should do the trick https://www.youtube...watch?v=me1y78yMOSo
[theircompetitor, Apr 25 2018]


       For extra safety, add a thick metal rod which extends above the wearer's head, runs down the side of the suit, and is attached to a large spike driven solidly into the ground.   

       In an emergency this can act as a lightning rod, however its primary purpose is to physically attach the wearer to the ground, at a safe distance from the predicted track of the storm.
Wrongfellow, Apr 25 2018


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