Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Menso-Pump

Banishes Menstrual Flow- Effortlessly
  [vote for,

Every month your period can make life a little awkward. Whether it's because you have a hot date or it's those new white trouser you really want to wear. Well worry no more, there is no need to place your unclean underwear in the sink and repulse your partner because the Menso-Pump is almost here! Simply take the discretely designed pump into the bathroom with you when your period first begins. Attach one end to yourself and the other to the specially designed filter pump. When you start, the pump begins to gently wash your womb lining away using the specially prepared sterile, saline solution, as to prevent any infection. Your period will now be over in a matter of minutes instead of days, leaving you to get on with your life the way you want to!
torinewcombe, Apr 16 2002

see links in this halfbakery idea http://www.halfbake...monthly_20friend_22
and everyone mentions white dresses/trousers too. [sappho, Oct 04 2004]

The Keeper http://www.keeper.com/
save money and be good to the environment [runforrestrun, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Menstrual extraction http://www.mum.org/MenBloExtrac.htm
Baked. Patented! [hello_c, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Del-Em http://www.io.com/~...ion/extraction.html
Actually built. [hello_c, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Stop it with drugs http://www.pharmj.c...d_menstruation.html
A new method of thwarting nature [dare99, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]


       don't you think, that if this were possible, over a million women OB-GYN's would have developed it already? The truth of the matter is that what you suggest is too difficult, dangerous, and invasive for the lay person to do. There's the problem of getting the "sterile, saline solution" through the cervix and then to have it have enough force and accuracy to clean all the uterus lining. there are about 5 more things wrong with this idea....but I'm done for now. It's a nice idea for women I'm sure(croissant) but just not practical on any level (fishbone). Go get on Depo-P as birth control...I've heard it stops menstration. Or become anorexic (OK, bad joke) or get spayed.
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       Well I think it would have been a great idea - would have saved a fortune on sanitary products!
Clair, Apr 16 2002

       OK....you want to save money? try the link that I'm about to add. It's also good for the environment and I'm pretty sure you can wear white pants with it!
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       giggles, it looks like a sink plunger, runf. giggles helplessly.
po, Apr 16 2002


       but, very effective ...ah...so I've been told ;-)
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       apparently if you buy the 'keeper' you will become happy, healthy, athletic and attractive! For 49.95 that is one hell of a deal!
rbl, Apr 16 2002

       waugs, man, you know we gotta keep up on these things....express our feminine side, be sensitive, and all of that ;-)   

       I'm not sure the alternative you suggest will work either. I think the body will have to get rid of the buildup at some point. Also, most pill packs now actually have 4 different types of pills with a different pill color and hormone level for each week and the placebo for the fourth week. I'm pretty sure that the female body would have to menstrate to handle these different hormone levels. but...I could be wrong (not quite the encyclopedia)
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       Wouldn't it be better to make white clothes with blood stains the cool fashion thing to wear, much as jeans with sweat stains are now de rigueur? (I think it's also de rigeuer to misspell de rigueur.)
pottedstu, Apr 16 2002

       //apparently if you buy the 'keeper' you will become happy, healthy, athletic and attractive! For 49.95 that is one hell of a deal!//   

       and Earth-Conscious!
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       so does this mean I should chuck my new anti-sweat/sweat gland pump out the window?
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       runforrest - I was under the impression that in the most basic terms, The Pill works by using hormones to convince the body that it is pregnant. 'Buildup', as you describe it, is the protective thickening of the uterine wall. Then in the fourth week of pills or the week off them (depending on the type), the hormones are absent/different, and the body is alowed to think it's not pregnant again, so it sheds the protective lining. If one continues to take the pill without the breaks, there will not be a continued gradual increase in the production of the protective lining. Once it is thick enough, it doesn't need to produce much more. So there is a standard 'amount' which will be released after one stops taking the pill. The considered danger to continuing to take the pill without breaks is that the hormone levels are set higher than they need to be, to ensure efficacy. Such high levels of hormones are not necessarily a good thing for the rest of one's physiology.
The softcup thing in the links in the idea that I linked to (above) looks interesting. Reasonably natural if a bit of an icky concept.
sappho, Apr 16 2002

       I stand corrected. It doesn't seem to be a good idea though. As bliss said, it interfers with a natural and necessary process.   

       Don't sweat it bliss, we're all hormonally challenged at times. ;-)
runforrestrun, Apr 16 2002

       [waugs] At least according to my doc that approach increases cancer risk a lot.
bristolz, Apr 16 2002

       I suggest an environmentally friendly compost tampon. The menstrual products are broken down into odorless soil. The tampon can be discreetly emptied during a walk in the park a la "The Great Escape."
FarmerJohn, Apr 17 2002

       Belt 'n' braces approach - fix 'n' snip.
neelandan, Apr 18 2002


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