Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Skirling Vacuum Cleaner

aka suck and blow
  [vote for,

There is nothing like the skirl o' the pipes as the playing of bag-pipes is commonly referred.

The problem with bag-pipe playing is that is very noisy and takes a lot of wind capacity on the part of the musician. Learning to play is also time consuming, when there are better things to be done, like vacuuming.

The Skirling Vacuum Cleaner solves all of these issues with one simple device, that facilitates simultaneous cleaning and bag-piping. It's a basic attachment that runs an extra tube off the vacuum cleaner hose and into a set of specially adopted bag-pipes. These bag-pipes are powered by the continuous suction provided by the vacuum cleaner, so they operate on a slightly different principle, but they sound the same.

All of this means that the process of playing and cleaning becomes a two person operation, requiring a bit of choreography; one to operate the hoovering component, and the other to dance around them to avoid tangling or tripping on the hoses while at the same time providing musical accompaniment.

xenzag, Mar 16 2012


       // There is nothing like the skirl o' the pipes //   

       True, but having your ears bored out by a pair of myopic dentists wielding pneumatic road drills with blunt bits, while you are being forced to bite on broken light bulbs by a hyena high on LSD comes quite close.   

       // but they sound the same //   

       There's your problem, right there.   

       // musical accompaniment //   

       <ahem> Trade Descriptions Act <ahem>
8th of 7, Mar 16 2012

       Bagpipes = [+]
zen_tom, Mar 16 2012

       //specially adopted bag-pipes//   

       I think the obsession with bag-pipes is going a little too far...
mitxela, Mar 16 2012

       Bag-pipes offer the possibility of endless ideas.
xenzag, Mar 16 2012

       That may be so, but it gave me an image of an orphanage full of bagpipes.
mitxela, Mar 16 2012

       Good image.
xenzag, Mar 16 2012

       Good idea. We need more pro-bagpipe posts around here.
Alterother, Mar 16 2012

       Agreed. Big, solid wooden posts, for nailing bagpipes -and pipers - to, pour encourager les autres.
8th of 7, Mar 16 2012

       Solar powered flocking bagpipes.   

       That's what's needed.   

       I've heard wind powered 'flocking bagpipes' on occasion.
AusCan531, Mar 17 2012

       //Bag-pipes offer the possibility of endless ideas// They only seem endless.
mouseposture, Mar 17 2012


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