Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The backside zipper

  (+1, -4)
(+1, -4)
  [vote for,

Why not? A zipper in the back of the pants -- no more public toilet seat cover problem. Plus, it could turn into a fashion statement.
globaltourniquet, May 05 2001

The Church of No-Pants http://www.halfbake...rch_20of_20No-Pants
No need for backdoor zippers here. [DrBob, May 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) Kris Kross, as AfroAssault reminds us. http://www.arachnoi...tside/posts/12.html
"They had it all, the look, the skill, and of course their pants on backwards." [jutta, May 05 2001]

rab latox pants http://www.macmount....co.uk/menu/rab.htm
pants with front zipper _and_ rear 'crap' flap [jcomeau_ictx, Jun 07 2005]

drop seat http://www.outdoorp...ptID=&SKU=PDS_KTDRO
drop seats apparently available only on women's drysuits [jcomeau_ictx, Jun 07 2005]


       I own several pairs of jeans and slacks with zippers in the back. Some think them sexy.
bristolz, May 05 2001


       Or, worse, drooping into the water entirely.
egnor, May 05 2001

thumbwax, May 05 2001

       Or not getting entirely out of the way of 'business'.   

StarChaser, May 05 2001

       Velcro works. OK baked. As for 1977, I'm not talking about that girly half-way down zipper. That wouldn't serve the stated purpose....
globaltourniquet, May 05 2001

       how about wearing your trousers the wrong way round
dekoi, May 06 2001

       Good call! Given the existing trends of ill-fitting pants and baseball caps worn backwards, that fusion seems inevitable.
jutta, May 06 2001

       UB, he said that he doesn't *care* to go there, not that he doesn't go, you see... ;)   

       <tangent> Just this weekend, a friend and I were discussing the rigors of surfing. A full wetsuit is tight around one's wrists and ankles, and is only barely permeable once sufficiently sodden. When one farts in such a suit, there is only one route of egress, that being the hole around the neck, and given that the gas is lighter than the surrounding wet suit, the expulsion is highly unlikely to stay where it is put. I arrived at a solution of sorts; stitch a small hole in the fabric, surrounded by a torus that wraps from the outside of the suit in, the hole being loosely fitted to leave the anus exposed, whilst maintaining a seal with the surrounding skin therearound. Were this hole covered with a semi-permeable membrane (less permeable than the surrounding wetsuit material, naturally), the problem of pure, pressurized neck farts could be entirely relieved. And, aside from that, I just got to use the phrase 'neck farts'. Joy.
absterge, May 08 2001

       Not a chance! Last thing I want after a couple of beers is complicated access to my bits; Ziiiiiiip, Pssssssssh, AAAAGGGGGHHHH! or worse.
Ivy, May 08 2001

       All the problems noted above could be solved if only you people joined the Church of No-Pants.
DrBob, May 08 2001

       Or surfed naked
thumbwax, May 08 2001

       As for wearing pants backwards, am I one of the few young enough to remember the "Kris Kross" disaster?
AfroAssault, May 09 2001

       Thumbwax: Surfing Naked is BAD!! the chafing is amazing, the shrinkage is amazing and the cold is really amazing. It's not worth it.
salmon, May 09 2001

       And you would know this.....how??
Galileo, Sep 23 2001

       Backside zipper? Sound good!. Everytime I can I wear my jeans on backwards. Before KrissKross style appears I always liked to weare pants on backwards. When I was a teenager my friends used to tell me I was creative just because I wore my Levi's that way. Now I'm 40 and sometimes still like to put my pants on backwards (Let me tell you that Lee Jeans fits perfect when you weare them backwards). Unfortunately I can´t do that when I work, but a taylor who is a friend of me is very smart to alterate my pants. I do not like fly front pants and it´s really impossible to find no fly pants in the stores. He can hide zippers behind the pockets, but someday he prefered to put the zipper on the backside and let me tell you that those are my favorite trousers.
backies, Jul 27 2002

       is it wrong that the first thing that came to my mind is the ease of anal sex with this device?
punk_punker, Nov 13 2006

NotTheSharpestSpoon, Nov 13 2006

       already baked: I've known girls who have pants with the zipper in the back
ModernDivo, Nov 13 2006


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