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"speed up or I'll kill you!"

Electronic Exercise Motivator
 
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Some people have a hard time motivating themselves to get in shape by running, and do much better with someone to motivate them. Sometimes, however, nobody is available. So I propose this:

A small device about the size of an I-Pod that straps on your leg and measures how fast you're running. You preset a certain speed that you feel comfortable running at, and if you get below that speed it starts motivating you, shouting anything from threats to "I love you"s. Or, you can record some motivational speech from a friend and program the device to say those when you start to get below your desired running speed.

21 Quest, May 28 2006

combine with this http://www.halfbake...20music_20generator
to play awful 80s pop if you're not perfoming [neilp, May 29 2006]

Nike + ipod http://www.apple.com/ipod/nike/run.html
Besides keeping track of your performance, maybe the shoe device could give an electric prick to the foot if you're not going fast enough. [Pericles, May 29 2006]

There's a bomb on the bus... http://www.ardalohanlon.co.uk/speed4.jpg
Actually, there was a bomb on the milk float, in the hilarious episode of sitcom Father Ted entitled "Speed 3". If Dougal lets the milk float drop below 4mph, the bomb will blow... [Jinbish, May 31 2006]

[link]






       possibly a few well-timed bullet-richot noises accompanied by 'run! run ! or I'll kill you [expletive-deleted]!' may add to the motivation...
monojohnny, May 29 2006
  

       "There is a bomb attatched to this I-Pod. If your speed drops below than 6 miles an hour, it will explode"
hidden truths, May 29 2006
  

       The nike + ipod device has all the features here, except the motivational messages from your friends, which is my favorite part. +++
Pericles, May 29 2006
  

       Or even one of those exploding collars like in the film 'The Running Man'
monojohnny, May 30 2006
  

       Agree with [Brau], should administer increasingly painful electric shocks.
epicproblem, May 30 2006
  

       I wonder if the electric shocks could deployed in such a way as too flex the running muscles anyway - meaning you'd be forced to run whether you like it or not...
monojohnny, May 30 2006
  

       Electric shocks, just like a dog collar. It should have a time limit so that you don't have to run forever. (Avoid wearing a watch. It'll tell you when you're done. This is much better than watching the time all the while.)
kevinthenerd, May 30 2006
  

       //it should have a time limit// you had to spoil it, didn't you?
dbmag9, May 30 2006
  

       Re: "you had to spoil it, didn't you?"
  

       I was taking the idea seriously. I think I want to build something like this.
kevinthenerd, May 31 2006
  

       Make it play Ice Cream Chimes. If the noise alone dosn't make keep your speed up, you'll have to run from all the angrily disappointed kids.
egbert, May 31 2006
  

       Faster Pussycat, Kill! Kill! if dropped below 5 mph. Fatter Pussycat, Trot! Trot! if dropped below 4 mph
jellydoughnut, May 31 2006
  

       I thought this was going to be about automobile traffic.
caspian, Jun 01 2006
  

       I actually think this will work. I hate computers talking to me. Hate it. I'd run like the devil to keep this from happening. I have virus software that thinks its cute to tell me my 'virus database has been updated' every flipping ass morning I turn my computer on. Every morning I talk back in rage: "No Shit, Huh!?!" +
daseva, Jun 18 2009
  

       // I hate computers talking to me. //
  

       "Hi there, [daseva], how are you today ? How's the exercise programme going ? Sorry about the pod bay doors, but we can't open them right now. Share and Enjoy !"
8th of 7, Jun 18 2009
  

       "And we've updated you virus database for you...."
8th of 7, Jun 18 2009
  

       <throws tufts of hair at the monitor>
daseva, Jun 18 2009
  
      
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