h a l f b a k e r y
You think: Aha! We go: ha, ha.
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
Everyone who has ever lived in an apartment
complex can sympathize -- Its 3 AM, and the
pool outside is filled with drunken fratboys
with lukewarm IQs.. Cellphone-toting teens
who seem to have been absent from school the
day they taught "friendly neighbor"
ettiquette. Imagine a scene....Half
retarded knuckledraggers with baseball caps
turned backward, brims meticulously bent,
standing between you and a good night's
rest... Surely there has to be a way to
communicate your thoughts and feelings in a
way Mr. Hip-hop Monkey Boy can understand --
Enter the Sonic Grenade. This buzzbomb could
be purchased at any hardware store, and
would be kept in the household in the event
of an outside annoyance. Each grenade is
essentially a large D-cell flashlight
battery, connected to a string of piezo-
electric buzzers that wrap around the
outside, piezo buzzers similar to those
found in smoke detectors, for example. The
sound of only one of these buzzers is enough
to disturb even the laziest monkeys -- A
string of a dozen wrapped around the outside
would be absolutely deafening.
The user sets the Sonic Grenade's timer by
turning a small knob on top, to indicate how
many minutes to wait before activsting. You
pull the pin, and the timer begins to count
away the seconds before the buzzers are
activated. The duration of the noise is set
via a second knob on the bottom of the
Imagine this scenario: Its late, its dark
out. You dont want to confront the monkeys
making the noise outside, so you grab your
Sonic Grenade and set the timer for 20
minutes. You open your window, pull the pin,
and toss the grenade outside so that it
lands in the grass near the pool's edge. 20
minutes later, a painfully loud
SCCHKKRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE sound erupts
from the grenade---The pool party primates,
upset by the noise, leave the area. Rather
than risk serious dasmage to their hearing
they will retreat back to their cages,
putting an end to the monkey madness
outside. As an added bonus, the police
would probably be called by one of your
neighbors, alleviating you from the task of
reporting it yourself.
The backside of the packaging for the
Buzzbomb Sonic Grenade would include
easy-to-identify photos of your targets.
Drunken frat boys. People who listen to rap.
People with car subwoofers. Politicians. You
name it -- Simply look up their face on the
chart and learn what to expect from them
after the grenade goes off.
Total construction cost: About $2 each
Market cost: About $9 each
Funny as hell: Yes
[Bowie23]: You're in luck as [Delcan] has recently come up with a solution to your problem that doesn't involve generating yet more noise. [bristolz, Apr 10 2002]
[dag, Apr 11 2002]
Can a noise be loud enough to kill you?
Sound at 160dB causes eardrum rupture. Suggests an air blast at about 200dB could cause lung rupture or embolisms, but this is from an explosion rather than a periodic sound. [pottedstu, Apr 12 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]
||Why not call the police? Are you *that* afraid of retribution? What stops the 'pool party primates' from kicking your grenade into the pool? That's what I'd do. How much more sleep are you going to get with this device going off versus listening to the people outside?
||Still sounds like a rant.
||Sounds like a rape alarm. Only dumb.
||I can see this having a military potential. Non-lethality is becoming more popular in some circles. Sound weapons already exist and more are on the way, but I can't say I heard of the remote grenade configuration yet.
||The pain level is on your device is a little high compared to the threat (or annoyance in this case), and it would have to be more survivable as [phoenix] noted. Hearing loss is not a primary objective of a sound weapon. Instant migraines, and nausea are two of the most common objectives. More lethal levels can be obtained all the way up to scrambling someone's innards.
||I doubt there's anything on any official web pages to substantiate my claim, so my apologies there. I try to back up what I say, but in this case just extrapolate some of the non-lethal performance numbers and you end up with some lethal devices using current technologies.
||The [link] doesn't back up my scrambling innards comment, but it is interesting and informative reading on RF (EM) devices (weapons).
||UnaBubba, I think the reason there aren't any links is because this stuff is mostly built out of public view and probably violates a treaty or two. As you said, the capability already exists, it's just not tailored for weapons use. Nasty stuff no matter what. Not sure if they have a web site, but research SARA Inc, out of CA, USA If you really want to dig.
||I've got a solution to your problems, phoenix.
||First, to keep them from kicking it into the pool. Simply use some extra battery power to run some nice nichrome (aka toaster) wires that are wrapped around the outside. No one will pick it up with their hands; add some pop-up spikes to keep them from kicking it (remember, these people are inebriated slobs and won't come up with any creative solutions).
||Then, to allow you to sleep: the frequency can be modified to whatever you want. Comes with a pair of headphones that generate a precisely opposite waveform to that that the grenade produces. The destructive interference cancels precisely the shrieking noise.
||Remington ( the firearms people) already make this item. I purchased 2 in a local mall on clearance for about $8.00 US. It is activate by squeezing and deactivated with a set sequence of your choice 2-fast squeezes than 1-long squeeze you get the idea. It runs on 4-AAAA batteries and produces an ear shattering tone that cuts right through you for up to 10' away.
||(wetmatch)could you put a link up.Cheers
||Looks like you missed that "friendly neighbor" etiquette class, too, Bowie.
||Each one of these guys buys a stock of them, and
then every night go around throwing them in the
neighborhoods where they don't live. The police are
afraid of them. So they stop you instead and ask to
see your driver's license or check if you put on a seat
||Sorry, technology is not the solution... (unless they
don't know about it)