Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Hoarders Without Borders

On The Hunt for OCD... And Decent Ratings
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This organization consists of teams, containing a psychologist, a compulsive hoarder, and a film crew. They trek across the continents, and across borders, in search of obsessive compulsive people that hoard.

When a hoarder is located, the team splits up and each one in turn attempts to explain their point of view. The hoarder on the team will congratulate the guy on his piles of useless crap, and suggest improvements. The psychologist will attempt to explain the intricacies of obsessive compulsive disorders, and how he believes the guy is a sick person in need of assistance and psychiatric medication. After both have made their case, the guy then must decide whether he wants to continue his hoarding ways or seek assistance to kick the habit (often with the help of rock-paper-scissors with his spouse, and a stealthy discussion of the black market value of any psychiatric medicine he is able to extract from the team).

The various interactions are mixed and recorded for use in prime time cable markets, financed by pharmaceutical companies.

Grogster, May 25 2011

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       I hoard emptiness. My place is crammed full of it.
rcarty, May 25 2011
  

       Might I suggest a nice serotonin reuptake inhibitor medication...
Grogster, May 25 2011
  

       There's no such thing as 'hoarders', but there are sick, perverted people who think that it's OK to throw away something that might potentially have some use, and that there's even such a place as 'away' on a finite planet.
spidermother, May 25 2011
  

       Would this organisation of teams be satisfied with only a few series of perhaps twelve episodes, and then leave it at that, or would they feel compelled to collect the whole set?
Ian Tindale, May 25 2011
  

       What if they find a hoarder that collects documentary film crews?
8th of 7, May 25 2011
  

       [spidermother], thanks for that. (Maybe you should write that down and hand it to the producers -- nah, they'd probably just send a film crew over...) In the mean time, might I suggest a nice serotonin reuptake inhibitor medication...   

       [Ian], I suppose the number of episodes would depend on the ratings (and the willingness of the producers to post bail when they're caught). Even if it turned out to be compelling reality teevee, the producers could still pull the plug. Just look what happened to Firefly.   

       [8th], that would make for an excellent final episode! (Provided the guy would allow the film to leave the pile)
Grogster, May 25 2011
  

       I think there should be at least a few episodes where the teams don't speak a word of the language for the country they're in, and don't have interpreters. They would have to communicate their points of view through pointing, charades, and wild arm gestures. Sure to be a hit with the kiddies!
Grogster, May 25 2011
  

       The twist here is to portray the hoard as the normal state of things. I do not think the boring psychiatrist would add value. Gesticulating foreigners with weird foreign hoards are a sure thing. I envision this as Hoarder Eye for the Hoarderii.   

       ok, "Hoarderii" is a stretch.
bungston, May 25 2011
  

       The urge to “collect the whole set” is interesting. It’s obviously occasionally a problem, most of the time less so, and a large amount of the time simply classified as one of those hobbies that one has. My understanding is that it is internalised as an anonymised “duty” (to whom and why is not explicit). One must curate, collect and preserve, for… well, someone. It’s your duty. It’s an out of control duty process.   

       Many years ago when I was writing the XSL-FO book I got up early in the morning and went for a walk, taking my Nikon 995. I shot a photograph each day without fail, of a place being cleared for building on. Each day I’d shoot the construction from more or less the same place. I might shoot other shots, or I might not, but at least that shot was taken each day. As the construction completed, the building became almost recognisable for what it is now.   

       I then realised that I was being compelled by the construction of the building that wasn’t mine, rather than what I wanted to do of my own volition. So I stopped taking photos. About a couple of months or so later, the construction was complete. People asked why I had “given up” prematurely. I hadn’t. I simply made a decision based on my own planning rather than being driven by a spurious “duty” to unknown others that I had somehow caught like a disease. I stopped because I was finished, not the building.
Ian Tindale, May 25 2011
  

       " ... and thankyou, Ian. Does anyone else have something they want to share with the Group ...?"
8th of 7, May 26 2011
  

       "I have this compulsion to stalk self-help gurus..."
RayfordSteele, May 26 2011
  

       / that I had somehow caught like a disease/   

       If the disease was scabies, I wonder if a thick coat of vaseline or pharmaceutical grade lard on the affected skin would suffocate out the little buggars. If it was not, carry on as you were - but if anyone else tries this for scabies please let me know what transpires.
bungston, May 26 2011
  

       // "I have this compulsion to stalk self-help gurus..." //   

       In what way does this statement represent a divergence from the median opinion ?   

       (Hint: This is not a trick question, nor is it rhetorical).
8th of 7, May 26 2011
  

       Stalk self-help gurus could be styled stylites.
bungston, May 27 2011
  

       Most posts so far are related to compulsive behaviors of OCD, not so much obsessive. A compulsion to stalk is a compulsion to obsess, divergent as compulsive obsessive, or COD... ?
Sir_Misspeller, May 27 2011
  
      
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