Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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I think this would be a great thing to not do.

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Minimalist urinal

Keep it simple
  (+2, -1)
(+2, -1)
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For a very simple urinal we could just use hole in the wall connected to the house sewer system. Current urinals are much bigger than necessary and not very efficient at washing.

This one would just be a hole in the wall with a lid that would automatically open after detecting a potential user’s proximity. After usage, the lid would close and the interior would be washed in a much more efficient way than current urinals. The hole would be cone shaped in the interior so that even erect penises could be inserted in it. This would cover that I-want-to-piss-so-much-but- I-can’t-because-of-this-stupid-erection problem that sometimes afflicts men in the morning. Also, because, not everyone has the same height, the urinal would be mounted on a slit in the wall, so that it could be moved up or down, according to the height of the user. Finally, to make the users feel more comfortable about inserting their penises in a hole in the wall, the urinal would be illuminated. This way the user could see there was nothing inside.

PauloSargaco, Sep 25 2003

Found it! http://www.halfbake...ea/Urinal_20Fairing
[squeak, Oct 04 2004]

umbrella wrapping device http://ocmominmanil...3/umbrella-wrap.jpg
[not_morrison_rm, Dec 10 2014]


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Annotation:







       I think you'll find a hole in the ground a superior approach, which is the standard in Asian countries, unless you want drips all over the ground (or the ceiling, depending just how wooden your woody is).   

       By the time you have converted your hole to a slit, you might as well start off with the vertical format urinal used in most British public bathrooms, then put a door on it. You're still hardly gaining anything (marginally less smell, maybe?), in return for a lot of machinery likely to break in a place no one is going to want to fix it.
DrCurry, Sep 25 2003
  

       Not for the subtly-put "I-want-to-piss-so-much-but- I-can't-because-of-this-stupid-erection problem" he won't.   

       Didn't there use to be an idea on here called something like "Toilet Elephant"? Remember it being similar to this...
-alx, Sep 25 2003
  

       I suggested something very similar in my very first anno ever on the HB. I can't remember what the post was. Hmmm...Anyway, everyone slated me saying that public loos are always gross and there is no way that men will stick their willies through a hole where someone else has been sticking their willy. (Oh God. Just read what I wrote.That's just asking for it. I wonder how long it will take)
squeak, Sep 25 2003
  

       Found it now, see link. I just searched for "squeak willy hole". How embarrassing.
squeak, Sep 25 2003
  

       //(...) unless you want drips all over the ground (or the ceiling, depending just how wooden your woody is). //   

       How will you get drips wherever if you stick your dick in a hole? It's impossible.   

       // I imagine some users will still piss from a distance and try for the long shot, thus creating even more of a mess. //   

       They can still do it that when using a regular toilet, so that's not the idea's fault. Also, it's useless to try aiming from far since the lid would be closed.   

       // Also, it sounds like a starving perverts dream date, what's to stop a poor lonely dateless guy from humping the hole? //   

       Well, it's not really the sticking it in a hole that's fun, right? The hole must be tight. This hole wouldn't be tight at all.   

       // and there is no way that men will stick their willies through a hole where someone else has been sticking their willy. //   

       Hmm, maybe you got a point there...nope, can't see a problem there, it's just a problem of not touching the sides.
PauloSargaco, Sep 27 2003
  

       // It's just a problem of not touching the sides. //   

       Of course your wrap your member in one of the cylindrical tissues from the dispenser above the unit before inserting it. They come in three sizes (medium, large and impossible). After use the vacuum pump just sucks it down into the sewer. No need to touch anything which you'd rather not. [+]
Toto Anders, Dec 10 2014
  

       Tissues? I wouldn't want to put my penis in there without a condom. And if you're issuing those why bother with the plumbing?
Voice, Dec 10 2014
  

       condom, might as well have plastic bags in a holder, the tie up the bag and deposit bag in receptical on the left...as in Japan umbrella wrapping device...link
not_morrison_rm, Dec 10 2014
  


 

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