Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Expensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.

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Remote control condoms

condom put on with the push of a button
  (+2, -6)
(+2, -6)
  [vote for,

Most of us know how unromantic it is to stop making out to put on a condom. Besides after taking your date out for a two or three dinners you really dont know her well, but how do you say... " I want sex, but never want to have children with you, or trust you enough to know you dont have a nasty STD".. to avoid this uncomfortable situation we should add a button to the remote control which covertly puts on a condom .. You could make up some excuse like "need a little more volume". While adjusting volume push the condom button and you're ready to drive the latex bus to tuna town!
gthorlak, Aug 28 2000


       I think this would sound painful even if I hadn't recently watched "Battlebots."
bookworm, Aug 28 2000

       Hmm, this is baked, check out my remote control :P
enveekaa, Aug 29 2000

       Why stop at the 'before?' Another button that will remove it for you afterwards; because, lets face it, which is the less desirable act... Of course, this could lead to a pretty damn painful situation if you accidentally pressed the 'second' button 'first.' Oh my...
Detly, Sep 13 2000

       I remember reading once about a set of valves that could be set by passing a magnet over the naughty bits, that would block the little wigglies but let everything else through. Haven't been able to find a link showing them, though.
StarChaser, Aug 25 2001

       excuse me mr peter sealy but where oh where is the diverted stream going to go or are you thinking of recycling it - how very green of you
po, Aug 25 2001

       You can train yourself to ejaculate into your bladder, apparently. Not sure exactly how that works though.
-alx, Aug 25 2001

       FINALLY! the lazy man condom has arrived! Is there a button that makes the condom do all the thrusting aswell so you can just lie back and feel the G's without any of the work? if not, WHY NOT!?
Geoff69, Sep 26 2003


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