Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Strap *this* to the back of your cat.

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The Spooky Hinge

Noise making device fitted to any door to make it creak
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The Spooky Hinge is the opposite of lubricating oil, in that it turns a normally quiet, diminutive door into a threatening, creaking portal. It is a modest mechanical device consisting of a set of calibrated, creaking hinges that can be slotted into place in various combinations, a selection dial, amplifier, volume control and loudspeaker.

In keeping with its function, it resembles a piece of arcane apparatus, such as might have been found in the laboratory of Dr. Jekyll. It is easily fitted to any door in the same manner as a hydraulic damper, with a hinged arm flexing and activating the groaning apparatus housed inside the main device attached to the wall.

After fitting, the previously benign door will screech and moan relentlessly, as the Spooky Hinge's internal mechanism grinds and struggles to overcome its lack of lubrication, the resulting noise being amplified by the hidden speaker.

Additional spooky hinges can be ordered, guaranteed to match a number of famous door sounds: i.e. Black Hole of Calcutta, Dracula's Lair, Dr. Frankenstein’s Basement.

xenzag, Apr 28 2006

Rusty patina http://www.monalisa...mat.com/patinas.htm
Old school method, sort of. [NotTheSharpestSpoon, Apr 28 2006]

[link]






       I like the controllable aspect of the device in that it allows you to choose volume and type of sound but I wonder if you could get a rusty, screeching sound using an unfinished patina application on your hinges as well. (link)   

       Nice idea though- it would be cool to put a really loud one on a tiny, little , itty , bitty, wee size jewelry box for added effect of showing off an ancient heirloom.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Apr 28 2006
  

       Add a deep, reverberated metal-on-metal *clank* when it closes fully. Can this be evil laugh activated?
Shz, Apr 28 2006
  

       The whole thing would be fairly easy with digital recordings etc, but I prefer a mechanical device. Rusty Patina - good name for a dog.   

       Just for you Shz, there will be a sister device on the frame post that makes a customisable "ker-junk" when the door shuts.
xenzag, Apr 28 2006
  

       Excellent. I'm going to let out an evil laugh anyway.
Shz, Apr 28 2006
  

       I'd get one as long as it was easy to turn on/off, and included a simple pressure plate in the entryway that would play a couple stanzas of creepy, foreboding music (or evil laughter) for anyone entering the room. Might work well as a burglar deterrent.
Whirligig, Apr 28 2006
  
      
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