Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Point of hors d'oevre

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The Viagra Monologues

Next Year's Answer To Desperate Housewives
  (+5, -4)
(+5, -4)
  [vote for,

See the adventures of Lawrence, who is on his second heart attack, but feels driven to perform and buys the pills on the Internet, since his doctor won't prescribe them.

Find out about Harry's recreational use, and in a crossover ER episode, the unfortunate situation requiring "immediate medical attention"

Sympathize with the gaunt looking Mitchell, who's in his own, self described, 36 hour hell with his latest girlfriend

Happy Valentines :)


theircompetitor, Feb 14 2005

The Penis Dialogues http://www.ubersite.com/m/33497
[Detly, Feb 15 2005]

Talking Cock http://www.talkingcock.co.uk/
[calum, Feb 15 2005]


       I'll be watching.   

       edit: no I won't
dentworth, Feb 14 2005

       you are on your own with this one, obviously... ;)
po, Feb 14 2005

       po, you can't get me down on this one [param,pam].   

       I'm here all week.
theircompetitor, Feb 14 2005

po, Feb 14 2005

       Please do not threaten me with puns
You know they make the landlord reel
And rather than those buns of steel
Submit some culinary buns
theircompetitor, Feb 14 2005

       "All rise for the honorable Mr. Johnson."
Blumster, Feb 15 2005

       Best (and most plausibly fictional) viagra story I have heard involved a rugby player's stag weekend. At the airport, before flying off to Barcelona, the loosehead prop stag is huckled by his 'mates' into the airport lavatories, forcibly stripped and coerced into wearing an all-in-one, lycra Spiderman costume, at least two sizes too small. As consolation, the now pinched and mincing stag, pink flesh bulging at the seams, is led to the airport bar, for a seven am eye opening pint of lager, which he is required to down. As the booze slips down his throat and the glass bottom comes level with his eyes, he sees, bright blue against the amber liquid, the remains of two Viagra diamonds.   

       Within half an hour he is upstanding, seated on the 'plane, tenting furiously against the shiny lycra, mortified at the special attention he is getting from the game flight attendants and quite unable to get his tray table down.
calum, Feb 15 2005

       hope he had an aisle seat. did he have to declare it as hand luggage?
etherman, Feb 15 2005

       I read that as hard luggage.
po, Feb 15 2005

       Viewers wouldn't have a bar of this. They wouldn't touch it with a 40 ft pole. They wouldn't stand for it. They'd be up in arms. They'd rise up in revolt. Their anger would swell. They.....
ConsulFlaminicus, Feb 15 2005

       If Lawrence has had Heart attacks, why couldn't he do "the angina Monologues?....lol
-wess, Feb 15 2005

       now that's an excellent point
theircompetitor, Feb 15 2005

       surely "The Vagina Dialogues" would be more elucidatory.
neilp, Feb 16 2005

       I think I saw that movie.
theircompetitor, Feb 16 2005

       What the critics thought:   

       'A very wooden performance.'
etherman, Feb 16 2005

       With a climactic ending.
FarmerJohn, Feb 16 2005


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