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Meteorite helmet

In case a meteorite hits, your safe
  [vote for,

This multi-layered helmet has everything you need in it, to protect your head in the case of a meteorite impact.

[Edit: Please note - This product was located under product:safe by machine translation. ]

The composite carbon MH has an extremely thin and lightweight layer of lead, to stop radioactivity, a Styrofoam layer to protect you from debris, and a very thin layer of gold colored plastic, so that 'gold' will mentioned.

Built with homeopathy in mind, a thin layer of imperceptible meteorite material is included, as well as an extremely low power magnet just for good measure. The magnetic map of the MH will be printed in the manual, explaining the product, and will add to its placebo affect.

Will sell like hotcakes, and cost almost nothing to make.


People who bought this, also bought the anti hurricane coat, the home anti earthquake warning device, and the child leash.

pashute, Nov 12 2013


       This product was located under product:safe by machine translation.
pashute, Nov 12 2013

       My safe is already very well protected from meteorites; my having encased it in concrete and buried it at the bottom of a convenient mineshaft.
Zeuxis, Nov 12 2013

       //well protected from meteorites; my having encased it in concrete and buried it at the bottom of a convenient mineshaft// ... thus offering an obvious method of protecting onesself as well.
pocmloc, Nov 12 2013

       // The Chelyabinsk meteorite ... of 15 February 2013 ... caused a series of shock waves that shattered windows, damaged approximately 7,200 buildings and left 1,500 people injured. The largest ... fragments having a total mass of 654 kg (1,442 lb) were raised from the bottom of the Chebarkul lake. //   

       Better to wrap your head in your towel, wrap your arms round yourself, and rock backwards and forwards with your eyes closed chanting "This isn't happening, this isn't happening ..."
8th of 7, Nov 12 2013

       It's a good notion putting the meteorite material into the helmet. I mean what are the chances of having a meteorite on your head being hit by another?
AusCan531, Nov 12 2013

       Yes, I'm a bit disappointed that the helmet is not just a meteorite itself, with an indent for the head...
xandram, Nov 12 2013

       Don't use a nickel-iron meteorite; they're highly conductive, and you might avoid an impact from another meteorite only to fall victim to a lighting strike.   

       The irony would be delicious.
8th of 7, Nov 12 2013

       //In case a meteorite hits, your safe//   

       It's very unlikely that a meteorite will hit, my safe. It's in the third under-basement and, if anything does get through the overlying 9 floors, chances are I won't be around to worry about it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 12 2013

       Here I thought that this was going to be an alternative to the tinfoil hat.   


       I'm waiting.   

       Max, but how did your safe get to such an underground location in the first place? And how was the third under-basement created? I suspect that unbeknownst to you, a meteorite was involved.   

       Come to think of it, a meteorite safe would be fantastic. The robbers would be afraid to get too close, and anyways it would practically impossible to get to it before impact.   

       In the 1991 gulf war, in which Israel was "not involved" (except the country virtually closing down, under a blitz of rockets from Iraq) we were given boxes to carry with an "Anti Chemical Biologic and Atomic Warefare Kit" , the contents of which consisted of a gas mask (anti chemical), an Atropine syringe (anti biologic), and a thin clear plastic sheet with two handles, which you were to cover yourself with (presumably anti Atomic).
pashute, Nov 13 2013

       //how was the third under-basement created? I suspect that unbeknownst to you, a meteorite was involved.//   

       Well, if it was a meteorite, then it did a very good job of interior decor. Some of the plaster friezes in the south-south-east wing of the third under- basement are amongst the finest in Europe, albeit a little pornographic for some tastes.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 13 2013

       [pashute] - I think you'll find that the atropine was for nerve gas exposure. You'll know all about it due to the SLUDGE symptoms - (Salilvation, Lacrimation, Urination, defecation, gastro, emesis) - basically uncontrollable leaking out of all orifices. Atropine can be used (with caution) to reduce the effects of nerve gasses.   

       What's probably most interesting is what would happen if you autoinjected Atropine if exposed to a biological weapon. The atropine would do nothing to hinder infection, and would be like taking a massive overdose of speed or adrenaline, plus a little lsd. In that atropine is a deadly poison in the absence of a nerve agent reaction, choosing to hit yourself with the atropine upon biological weapon exposure might be viewed as a choice to die of atropine poisoning, instead of some weaponised disease.   

       In fact, I seem to recall reading that there were lots of issues with unnessecary application of atropine autoinjectors in Israel during the gulf war - possibly because of insufficient education about why/when to use it.
Custardguts, Nov 13 2013

       I am concerned the actual meterororoite might kick the price up. They are hard to come by. Better to use "the same alloyed space metal that comprises actual meteorites".
bungston, Nov 13 2013

       Sp meterororororoite
rcarty, Nov 14 2013


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