Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Stair pants

so your old cat can climb onto your lap
  (+16, -1)(+16, -1)
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Good for old or overweight lap-cat wannabees. In the standing position, the pants look like incredibly wide bell-bottoms (I've seen recent pictures of these pants with a foot-end opening diametre of, like, 2 feet...uh, 60 centimetres, to avoid confusion). But when you sit down, the firm foam-rubber inner architecture is revealed as a wee staircase, leading from the floor to knee-hight. so your ailing pet can gracefully ascend to your lap. Or your lazy pet can climb up with out jumping half way and then clawing his/her way up the rest.
Matty, Jul 11 2002

Stair Pants Concept Image http://www.stormpag...m/agharta/Main.html
Scroll down and click! [Matty, Jul 11 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       I'm so relieved that this isn't just another stupid "pants" idea from Resarf that I'll give you a croissant, even though I loathe and detest all felines.   

       Can I suggest a latex or PVC front to the pants so that things are "containable" when Old Tom loses bladder control ?
8th of 7, Jul 11 2002
  

       [8th of 7] good idea. much easier to clean.   

       I've added a link to a concept picture.
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       Corduroy is about the same thing.
reensure, Jul 11 2002
  

       hmm. maybe strap-ons, [bliss]? or maybe the chair needs to be reworked, rather than the pants. But I thought they looked rather schwanky. I'm considering selling the design...any takers? Resarf?
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       Despite the fact that my cat is the size of a small cocker spaniel (really) and middle-aged, he still makes vertical trips. I would like to keep him down.   

       Nevertheless I suppose the need exists for other felines. I'm all for strap-ons: tighten garter belt around leg, fasten small molded staircase onto thigh, and hold still with small can of tuna fish in hand until puss gets the point. Remove before re-ambulating.
polartomato, Jul 11 2002
  

       How disgustingly sweet is that link {bliss]? I can't believe it's allowed on the internet. I love cats, but ugh - check out the number one kitten (and the comments).
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       oh...sorry. gotta watch what I say, dammit. I rather like number 9.
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       No 5 *is* my backgarden but who took the picture I have no idea. croissant Mat. the numbers keep changing the one I referred to was called "feral cats"
po, Jul 11 2002
  

       For really old cats, the stairs could be replaced by an escalator. Or elasticated turn-ups acting as catapults/trampolines (cat climbs in, bounces up and down, and eventually reaches a sufficient height).
pottedstu, Jul 11 2002
  

       double helix escalators with a change over in the crutch area
po, Jul 11 2002
  

       Oh! [pottedstu] Your trampoline idea just gave me a great idea! Kitty stilts - that way they wouldn't have to climb up at all!   

       [po] a double helix escalator would allow for two cats, taking turns.
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       I'm Ok with cats. Don't like fat cats. Like piccies. Overall neutral but, if you can make the steps a bit shallower so my pet lobster can get up there, you might be in business.
DrBob, Jul 11 2002
  

       I'll make them shallower AND deeper, filled with water, so your pet salmon can run up your leg if you like.
Matty, Jul 11 2002
  

       8th.. I was thinking the same thing about another resarf idea.. maybe he combined pole pants with stair pants to give you a pants playground.. climb up, slide down, climb up, slide down..
Mr Burns, Jul 11 2002
  
      
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