Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Theme Machine

Bring your own theme music.
 
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Have you ever fancied what it would be like to make a "cinematic" entrance, complete with mucical accents? This invention makes that possible. At its core is a slimline CD/MP3 player, mounted at waist level on a flexible, (relatively) form-fitting harness. On the shoulder and back portions of the harness are small-but-powerful (ideally, concealable under clothing) high fidelity speakers capable of rich sound production to rival that of a good portable stereo system. Finally, the unit has a small, wireless remote which can be clipped onto a watchband, belt, lapel, etc. for convenient-yet-inconspicuous control of your personal musical accompaniment. Designed to be concealable under moderately heavy clothing, yet stylish enough in design to be worn plainly, this unit is perfect for strutting your stuff while walking down the street (with "The Theme From Shaft"), or for setting just the right tone for your entrance to the meeting you're presiding over (with "The Imperial March" from The Empire Strikes Back). Make *your* musical statement with The Theme Machine today!
Pharaoh Mobius, Dec 02 2002

Personal Theme http://web.archive....ea/Personal_20Theme
From the deep beyond! [tyskland, Oct 05 2004]

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       comes complete with the collapsible grand staircase (folds into the size of an umbrella) which you can hide beneath your billowing Scarlet O'Hara red velvet curtain dress...
po, Dec 02 2002
  

       a couple....but I'm too lazy to look for them....if they're still here that is...
Marassa, Dec 02 2002
  

       //How many times have we done this one now...?//
I couldn't tell you. I didn't see it in the archives.=/

Addendum: Apparently, I didn't look all that carefully. Ah, well. =/
Anyway, I like mine better than a lot of the ones I just read that were proposed: no invasive surgery, and it's not controlled by some hypothetical "mood sensor". Essentially, it's a wearable boom box, I guess.
Pharaoh Mobius, Dec 02 2002
  
      
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