Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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xenzag


a.k.a. The Ulcer-Fry

xenzag@hotmail.com

what is the sound of one cow clapping?

[Sep 18 2005, last modified Nov 27 2007]

    
(+11, -3) !00 Watt Heads
(+10, -2) 1, 2, boil up my stew
(+11, -3) 1.5 legged trouser lamp
(+27, -4)(+27, -4)(+27, -4) 10 Sparrows That Live In The Moon
(+5, -1) 12 Tree-matics Avenue
(+12, -4) 23.976 fps Glasses
(+9)(+9) £5Yo-Yo-Blair Coins
(+4, -2) 765,000 volt nests
(+19, -3)(+19, -3) 9 Months Later Balloon Baby
(+18, -1)(+18, -1) A Bigger Scream
(+6, -2) A Cursory Glance
(+8) A Flock of Keys
(+6, -2) A Large Black Foot in the Sky
(+8, -2) A License to Calculate
 A Pocket Lights Now
(+16, -2)(+16, -2) A Small Threaded Hole
(+6, -3) A Yard of Tea
 Abdomillumen
(+9, -1) Aerial of Thorns
(+18, -2)(+18, -2) Aerialodactyl
(+15, -2)(+15, -2) Alimentary my Dear Watson
 Angle of the North
(+11)(+11) Anglepoise Street Lamp
(+11, -1)(+11, -1) Ant Farm Bannisters
(+9, -3) Anti-Christ Chess
(+12, -1)(+12, -1) Aqua Morte
(+8, -10) Attack furniture on Patrol
(+8, -2) Autoquarium
(+16, -2)(+16, -2) Avenue of Dead Cars up in The Trees
(+5, -1) B52 Ranch
(+3, -5) bacon rind wire
(+4, -1) Baker's Gym of Hunger
(+8, -1) Barbarella Massage Bench
(+8, -1) bard-wire fence
(+2, -1) Beard Transplant Registry
(+5, -2) beardaclava
(+8) bed'n'breakfast
(+7, -4) Bed of Finger-Nails
(+7) behave beehive hairdo
(+9, -1) Bird Hats
(+11, -2)(+11, -2) Birds Who Get to Eat Cats
(+5) Black Jacket Illumination
(+43, -3)(+43, -3)(+43, -3) Blank-bank-note sketchbook
(+5, -3) Blego
(+12)(+12) Bling-Box
(+7, -4) Blinkini
(+6, -1) Blobbie Dazzlers
(+13, -1)(+13, -1) Boldly go where no Hadron has gone before
(+18, -2)(+18, -2) Book of the Secreted Image
(+3) Book Tongue
(+12, -7) born again swimmingly
(+7, -4) Brasilicas
(+4, -7) Breakfast Hose
 Brick-nic Hamper
(+12)(+12) Bristle Matrix Doormat
(+5, -1) Build-a-Boulder
(+4, -1) Build-a-Jaw
(+9, -1) Buttonright
(+5) Calder, Serra, Saffir-Simpson Wind Chimes
 Car-Kebab Ranch
(+13, -1)(+13, -1) car-locko-dile
 Car Toothpaste
(+9, -3) carsequencer
(+5) Cat-Case
(+5, -3) CD With a Single Hair
(+5, -2) Chainosaurus Rex
(+5, -1) Chakra 6 Wake up! Bindi Door Knocker
(+3, -1) Cheroot of Turin
(+11, -1)(+11, -1) Chimney Smoke Art Work
(+4, -2) Christmas Robin Attracting Beret
(+12)(+12) Chubbrella
(+9, -3) Church of Random
(+4, -1) Climb Down With a Clean Pair of Hands
(+17, -1)(+17, -1) Climbing Up The Walls of Everything
(+5, -1) Cling On Bouldervator
(+7, -1) Clock a Dildo-do
(+13, -1)(+13, -1) cogs of the realm
(+14, -2)(+14, -2) Combat Frills
(+7, -2) Compass Pyjamas
(+3, -1) Computer Starting Handle
(+13, -3)(+13, -3) Could You Resist The Hands of The Boston Strangler?
(+8, -3) Cowboy Wishbones
(+3) Croagh Patrick Pilgrimage Stair Carpet
(+21)(+21) Crutches With A Beach Setting
(+9)(+9) Cycloscope
(+9, -1) Dada Nests
(+17)(+17) Daffodish
(+19, -2)(+19, -2) Dante's 15º Inverse Purgatory Shopping Haj
(+4, -3) De-Fustered Golf
(+8, -2) De Selby's Domino Theory Apparatus
(+11)(+11) De Selby's Perpetual Jig-Saw-Jig-Saw
(+19, -1)(+19, -1) De Selby's Vanishing Chain
(+16, -5)(+16, -5) De-synchronised, Chromium Plated, Bobbing Meerkats, Zen Lake of Dark Viscosity
(+9, -2) Deep Pile Distressed Durango
(+6, -2) dentallations
(+4, -1) Desert Bonsai
(+6, -1) Digi-bell
(+8) Dino-snore of Darkness
(+6, -3) Dirt Fortified Infant Food
(+5) Disharmonious Forks
(+16, -11) Disloyalty Cards
(+8) DKNYoke
(+3, -1) Dog-gone Trousers
(+4, -2) dog motor
(+7, -2) Domestic Electricity Confusing Randomiser
(+3) Donald Trump Bluebottle Factory Head
(+9, -1) Door Teeth
(+14, -1)(+14, -1) Double Breasted Accordion Waistcoat
(+8, -1) Drag and Drop Soap TV
(+5, -1) Drinks Bandolier
(+8) Drinks Beetler
(+4, -2) Drunk Flap
(+6, -3) Dullsville Calibration System
(+7, -2) Duo-Can
(+9, -2) Ear Crisps
 Earverts
(+4, -1) Eating With Long Tapering Bony Fingers
(+1, -2) Eggs-a-sketch
(+11)(+11) Ego-ccino
(+6) egorrery
(+5, -1) Elastic Unlimited
(+1) Elbowgluteus Minimus
(+1, -3) Euro Food Surplus Triathlon
 Every Dog Has Its Duplex
(+3) Every Dog Has Its Warble
(+5, -1) Eye-Seat
(+6) Eye Tea Bags
(+4, -3) Face to Facecloth
(+2, -1) Famous Buildings Termite Mounds
(+6, -1) Famous Exact Inches
(+10, -8) Famous Last Rivets
(+5, -2) Fhoam! Calls
(+6, -3) Fiddler Crab Coat Sleeves
(+8) Fidgeting Style-ettos
(+35, -2)(+35, -2)(+35, -2) Field of Almost Identical Swaying Boulders
(+4, -1) Filing Cabinet Balconies
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Filing Cabinet Of Terror
(+10, -2) finger flash
(+4) Fingerfork
(+7, -1) fingerphones
(+13, -5) Fishy Fish Nets
(+8, -1) Fix Umbrayonets !
(+19, -3)(+19, -3) Four Poster Sofa
(+8, -2) Freeze Framous
(+8, -1) fridge belly
(+2) Frolic-Blankets
(+4) From CD to 3D
(+15, -2)(+15, -2) Frozen to The Back Teeth
(+8, -2) Funicular Spoon
(+18, -6)(+18, -6) Gently moving river which contains the antithesis of its own crossing
(+11, -3) Geranium Shepherd
(+8) Glue-Pit-Wrestling
(+15)(+15) Goat Edible Moped Humvee
(+49, -1)(+49, -1)(+49, -1) Grates of Hell
(+4, -1) Grow Hose
(+2, -1) gym-face-ium
(+4) Hairgienist
(+2, -3) Hairhenge
(+8, -1) Hairy Lego
(+5) Half-Dead
(+6, -1) Hamster's Wheel of Fortune
(+20, -2)(+20, -2) Hand Written Novel
(+3, -1) Happy Reaper
(+8, -4) Harmless Slapper Zapper
(+6, -1) Harold Lloyd Alarming Clock
(+30, -1)(+30, -1)(+30, -1) Hat of Mist
(+11)(+11) Have Vox AC30, Will Travel
 Head over Heels
(+14)(+14) Hexagonal Bottle Tops
(+11, -4) Hey - that's me
(+49, -6)(+49, -6)(+49, -6) Hide Behind Your Tiny Hands
(+20)(+20) Hideous Pecking Bird
(+4) High Rise Tents Park
(+4) Hornbrella
(+29)(+29)(+29) House of Fish
(+6, -2) Hunky Chunky Freeway Lane
(+7, -3) Hunter-rug
(+3, -1) Hurricane Reporter Wind Sock
(+5, -2) i-browse
(+6, -4) Icon Hunter Agency
(+4, -2) Imperial Thongs
(+11, -3) In a Silent Way, Under a Willow That Weeps
(+14, -1)(+14, -1) In Space No One Can Hear You Playing Chopin
(+16, -1)(+16, -1) In The Navy, Ironing Board
(+2) indominable snowman
(+6) Infini-tie
(+4, -1) Inner-Tubular Bells
(+3, -2) Insect-Vogue
(+7, -1) International Dock-Yard Dominoes
(+10, -2) iPPLAUD
(+4, -3) Jaccuzzi Coral Reef
(+29, -9)(+29, -9) Jason and The Arguenots
(+4, -2) Jeremy Clarkson Custard Gladiators
(+19, -1)(+19, -1) Kafka's Table Top of Pusillanimous Rejection
(+6, -3) Kaligraphic Printer
(+5, -3) "Kiss Me Deadly" Lap Top
(+11)(+11) Kneeboxes
(+5, -1) Kneejerk Piano
(+7) Knit-wits
(+4) Lap-top Laptop
(+17, -1)(+17, -1) Laundry Channel
(+5, -3) Lava Lamp Mermaid
(+5, -4) Leg-Barrow
(+18, -1)(+18, -1) Lego-go Shoes
(+4, -2) Lego-saurus
(+18, -5)(+18, -5) Legotanic
(+6, -1) Lift/Stairs punishment/reward scheme
(+10)(+10) Light Zeppelin
(+10, -2) Like-a-Card?
(+10)(+10) Lino-teeth
(+2, -1) Lipo-Buttons
(+6) Lips That Stick
(+6, -2) Litter-Snappers
(+1, -2) Living Lounge Refinery
(+9, -1) Logical Wigs of Tea
(+1, -2) Londonatomy
(+21, -6)(+21, -6) Long-life Reflecting Moon Sheep
(+11, -1)(+11, -1) Long Tapering Drawer of Natural Size Selection
(+4, -1) Lunar Sofas
(+20, -1)(+20, -1) Lung Book
(+9, -2) Möbius's Trip Award
(+7) Macho Mouse
 Macro-Mortia
(+3) Macropolitan Line
(+7) mahogany 137
 Make-car-nage
(+5) Man-Ray-Bans
(+11)(+11) McTartan's Chav Attracting Lake
(+8, -3) Me And My Chicken
(+9, -1) Meandering Ties
(+4) millipede landrowing
(+5, -2) Morris Minotaur Labyrinth
(+19, -3)(+19, -3) Morticulture Services Inc.
(+2) Mosaic Mount Rushmore
 Murmurs of Humanity at the Cardiac Jukebox
(+25, -3)(+25, -3)(+25, -3) Museum of Dubious Lyrical Apparatus
 Mutual Mugs
(+13, -2)(+13, -2) Mystery Train
(+2, -1) nailtraits
(+7, -2) Neanderthrill Picnic Set
(+11, -2)(+11, -2) Night Noise Shoes
(+13, -2)(+13, -2) Non-essential Blob Of Speculative Form and Function
(+9, -1) Norton Commando Variation Zimmer
(+9, -2) Nose Guttering
(+15)(+15) Nosey Parters
(+10, -3) Nostrilampus
(+15, -1)(+15, -1) Not IQ, FlyQ
(+8, -1) Nutcracker Laptop
(+6, -3) Office Mules
(+6) Old Head, New Shiny Shaft
(+3, -2) Olympic Bird Baths
(+16, -3)(+16, -3) One Used Tube Deserves Another
(+10)(+10) Op Art Venetian Blinds
(+3) Oppenheim's Nikonic Sidebangs
(+6, -1) Ouch Bumpers
(+6, -1) Outside Non-Pockets
(+5, -1) Paddle Your Own Canu-boat
(+5, -1) Palisade Piano
(+6) Parallelogram Parking Wardrobe
(+4, -2) Pavement Chewing Gum Psychology
(+4, -2) pavement piano
(+2, -3) Pecking Order Sofa
(+7, -3) Pedestrian Dashboard
(+3, -1) Pedestrian Tow-Ball
(+10, -3) Pedigree Basalt
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Pet Food Urbane
(+6) Phone Awning
(+11)(+11) Piano Forké
(+14)(+14) Pillow-Bash-Boing
(+3, -1) Pillow-talker
(+5, -1) Pinocchioknows
(+7, -1) Pixel-dozer
(+18, -1)(+18, -1) Place of Broken Hearts
(+8, -5) Planet You
(+7, -2) Pogo-roo
(+9)(+9) Polo-nut
(+8, -3) Precocious Barbie Wire
(+6, -1) Pullover of Secrets
(+10, -2) Pulsating, hydro/pneumatic Pollocks
(+6, -2) Puny-versity
(+13, -2)(+13, -2) Put Yourself Up On A Pedestal
 Quality Streak Chocolates
(+11, -4) QWERTY-VILLE
(+6, -1) Radiator of Aran
(+3) Rat-Trap Front Door
(+18, -2)(+18, -2) Rest In Print
(+10)(+10) Rest on Your Laurels
(+5, -3) Reverse Tazer Whale
(+4, -2) Rings of Perpetuity
(-1) Ripper-Dance
(+10)(+10) robinhoodie
(+8) Rub Out The Lines
(+2) Rubber Head Sink Plugs
(+51, -9)(+51, -9)(+51, -9) Running Man / Following Man
 Sandal Camp
(+4, -2) Saws First & Asks Questions Later
 Schrödinger's Straw Apparatus
(+15)(+15) Scumopoly
(+7) Sea-Beds
(+11, -1)(+11, -1) Secrets of Area 51 Confetti
(+3, -1) send-a-smell
(+3, -1) Shanks Anvil
(+12)(+12) Sheep in Sheep's Clothing
(+6, -1) Sheep Tone Phone
(+8, -1) Shimy-Shake Box Junction
(+7, -2) Ship-Shape-Shopping
(+19, -2)(+19, -2) Shop Windows of Unpredictable, Reciprocated Duality
(+13, -1)(+13, -1) Shoutcase
(+10)(+10) Shrinking Ray of Interrogation
(+25, -1)(+25, -1)(+25, -1) siamese sleeve of seduction
(+2) Side Lobes
 skatecasting
(+6) Skipping Rope Orchestra
(+3, -2) slightly pre-crushed cans
(+4, -3) Smart Arse
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Snail Koans
(+1) Snow Leopard Crossings
 Soap Screen
(+8, -1) Sofa Crumb Tray
(+2) Sofa-so-spa
(+4, -2) sofa transplant registry
(+12)(+12) Soft-Shoe Shuffle on a Hot Plate
(+10, -3) Spaghetti-Knits
(+6, -4) Speed Bunnies
(+8, -2) Spelling Bees
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Spend a Penny to Crush a Car
(+3, -1) Spooky Desk-Hand
(+16, -1)(+16, -1) Spring Loaded Lego
(+5, -2) Squirm-art
(+10, -4) SS Ben Hurry
(+7, -2) Starling Engine Idea
(+6) Startling High Voltage Reindeer Head Wall Light
(+7, -1) Stiletto-matics
(+17, -2)(+17, -2) Stochastic Dog Fountain
(+9, -1) Strap on Snooker Chin Wheel
(+5, -1) Superior Articular Moving Hand Rail
(+5) Supermarket Maze
(+25, -1)(+25, -1)(+25, -1) Swamp Mist Snooker
(+9, -2) Sweeney Todd Windscreen Wipers
(+8, -2) Swiss Cheese Tie
(+12, -5) Synchronised Drowning
(+8, -2) Tandem-Shoes
(+11, -3) Tanks of Shame
(+24, -2)(+24, -2)(+24, -2) Taxi-pedia
(+1, -2) Teeth of Wisdom
(+14, -3)(+14, -3) Telescopic Sink Plug Hole
(+9, -4) That's A Real Grey Area
(+7, -2) The Bird Men of Alka-Selzer
(+11)(+11) The Buddha of Ultimate Concentration
(+3) The Cat's Tongue
(+2, -1) the creche of belles (redux)
(+4) The Day of The Trolley
(+7, -4) The Delicious Square Root of Liquorice
(+29, -1)(+29, -1)(+29, -1) The Devil's Breath
(+19, -1)(+19, -1) The Early Morning Smell of Victory
(+6, -1) The Edging Goat
(+12, -1)(+12, -1) The Hungry Spider
(+17, -1)(+17, -1) The Impatient Hand
(+4, -3) The Lonely Sausage
(+1, -6)(+1, -6) The Never Lonely Gump Stoppers
(+11)(+11) The not so Great Wall of China
(+8, -1) The Reversal of the Great Greed
(+7, -1) The Spooky Hinge
(+12)(+12) The Third Glove
(+2, -1) The Third Shoe
(+23, -5)(+23, -5) The Tree Climbing Monkey's Bum
(+15, -1)(+15, -1) The Venetian Tie
(+6, -1) thumbnail library
(+8) Tickle my Tonsils, Ring My Bell
(+5, -2) Tie Steriliser
(+15, -2)(+15, -2) Tie-Suspender
(+4, -1) time-twigs
(+17, -2)(+17, -2) Times Lewd Roman
(+11, -1)(+11, -1) Toilet Fleet
(+6, -2) Torque-wrestling
(+13, -3)(+13, -3) Traction Iron
(+12, -2)(+12, -2) Traffic Lights of Orloj
(+7, -3) Transparent Bagpipes
(+7, -1) tri-kini
(+7, -1) Trombonic radiator
(+3, -2) Trouser Mouth Pockets
(+3, -5) Trouser Wig
(+9)(+9) TV cosy
(+5) Tyrematic Shoes
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Umbrella of Fear
(+7, -1) Uncubist filter
(+4, -3) V6 Room Heater
(+9)(+9) Ventricular Mouse
(+4, -1) Vertiginous Girder Restaurant
(+5, -2) Vortext (Basic +Delux)
(+11, -6) Wait Training Belt
(+8, -2) Wandering Bovine Traffic Flashers
(+4, -1) Watch What You're Reading
(+6, -1) Wilson & Keppel's Choreographed Roofing Felt
(+5, -1) Wirego
(+4, -1) World Hair-suit
(+6, -1) Your Face Ironing Your Pants
 Your Face on Mars
(+8, -1) Your Head Kettle
(+3) Your Large Building as a Television
(+16)(+16) Your New Born Baby as a Happy Bluebottle
(+10, -1)(+10, -1) Yourtube
(+8, -1) Zen Garden Lawn Mower
(+12, -3)(+12, -3) Zeno's Football
(+21, -9)(+21, -9) zenspoon
(+25, -2)(+25, -2)(+25, -2) Zoe-topiary
 
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